Major Payne
Major Payne is a 1995 American military comedy film directed by Nick Castle and starring Damon Wayans, who wrote with Dean Lorey and Gary Rosen. The film co-stars Karyn Parsons, Steven Martini, and Michael Ironside. It is a loose remake of the 1955 film The Private War of Major Benson, starring Charlton Heston. Major Payne was released in the United States on March 24 and grossed $30 million. Wayans plays a hardened military officer who, after being discharged, attempts to lead a dysfunctional group of youth cadets to victory in a competition.
23.1s
This is it, our big chance to get rid of Payne. We got two miles to get to Wellington. Let's get it outta there as fast as we can. Hustle, move it ! Let's go ! Go, go, go ! This is your last chance, Dotson. What, you think I'm gonna come and help you make me look bad ? Anyway, I called my dad. I'm leavin' this stupid school. Bye. Have a good time.
Major Payne
27.7s
What's the matter with you, boy ? They won't let me go on no black op. Th-They say I'm too little. No one ever lets you do anything when you're too little. Aw, phooey ! What about all those stories about the little people that do big things ? Like Little Red Riding Hood ? Them three little pigs ? Spike Lee ? Or them Little Rascals ? You ever hear the story about The Little Engine That Could ?
Major Payne
1m4s
Once upon a time, deep, deep in the jungle, there was a little engine that could. He was chuggin' his way across the enemy line. Chugga, chugga, chugga. Chugga, chugga. Toot, toot ! This little engine's mission... was to take some AK-47s and a nuclear payload... over the mountain to the 2063 Battalion. Needless to say, there was plenty opposition. You think that stopped the little engine that could ? No, siree, Bob. He just kept chuggin' along. Chugga, chugga, chugga. Chugga, chugga. Toot, toot ! Not even when they climbed aboard the train and popped out the eyes of the conductor, and blood and snot was drippin' out his eye sockets. You think that stopped the little engine that could ? Damn skippy. He just kept chuggin' along. Chugga, chugga, chugga. Chugga, chugga. Toot, toot !
Major Payne
1m8s
It wasn't until... Charlie rigged a bridge with plastic explosives... just as the little engine was makin' his way across the trestle. Boom ! An explosion happened. And blood and guts and spit and ass was everywhere ! And Bubba come crawlin' out the back door, both legs missin'. Lula May's baby boy ! He look up at me. He said, "Payne ! I can't feel my legs." I said, "Bubba, they ain't there." And I looked down, and them little bloody nubs was kickin' real fast, like this here. And I said, "Bubba, it's 30 miles to the nearest town. 'Less you can flip upside down and walk on your hands, you ain't gonna make it." All of a sudden, Charlie was all over the place ! It was just me and my sidearm. And I had no other alternative... but to blast my way out.
Major Payne
25.5s
I think I'll wait a moment. My stomach's a little upset. Them some mighty fine vittles. Shouldn't let 'em go to waste. You know, I think you're really making some wonderful strides... with the way you're dealing with the children. That was almost a really good thing... you tried to do for Tiger tonight. May I make a suggestion ?
Major Payne