Major Payne

Major Payne is a 1995 American military comedy film directed by Nick Castle and starring Damon Wayans, who wrote with Dean Lorey and Gary Rosen. The film co-stars Karyn Parsons, Steven Martini, and Michael Ironside. It is a loose remake of the 1955 film The Private War of Major Benson, starring Charlton Heston. Major Payne was released in the United States on March 24 and grossed $30 million. Wayans plays a hardened military officer who, after being discharged, attempts to lead a dysfunctional group of youth cadets to victory in a competition.

Video-background
9.3s
Present arms ! Order arms ! Left face !

Major Payne

Video-background
5.6s
Right face ! Rank, rest !

Major Payne

Video-background
19.9s
You're still a shit sandwich. You're just not a soggy one. From now on, you are no longer turds. You've graduated... to maggots. You're a family, a team. Let's win them games.

Major Payne

Video-background
7.2s
Squad ! Atten-hut ! General on deck.

Major Payne

Video-background
28.6s
Major, I have news so good I've decided to deliver it personally. America needs you. There's a situation in Bosnia that requires your special services. As of this moment, you are reinstated in the United States Marines... at the rank of Lieutenant Colonel. - Thank you, sir ! - Congratulations. Your unit will be leaving out of Washington. You will arrive tomorrow at 1600 for briefing. Here are your tickets.

Major Payne

Video-background
16.3s
Uh, General, uh, tomorrow are the military games, and I was hoping-- Games ? Payne, I fought to get you reinstated. You wanted in. I got you in. You don't take this, there won't be any more chances.

Major Payne

Video-background
6.6s
Sir, the major will be there, sir ! Good man. I'll see you in Washington.

Major Payne

Video-background
6.2s
Hey, hey, hey, Major. Where you goin' ? Back to killin'. You wanna come ?

Major Payne

Video-background
19.5s
I didn't think so. Go lead your men into victory. Great. What happened to unity and family... and all that other bullshit that you taught us ? I never said families don't break up. Don't you watch Oprah ?

Major Payne

Video-background
3.1s
So it's true. You're just gonna leave.

Major Payne

Video-background
4.9s
You know, when they're through with you, they're just gonna cut you loose again.

Major Payne

Video-background
34s
I asked to leave. Them boys are makin' me soft. Them boys need you ! All that hard work they did, they did for you. - They did it for themselves. - Benson. Look, woman. I toured 11 separate engagements. I didn't do that to come back and be conquered by no woman and a bunch of kids. What'd you really think I was gonna do, marry you ? Put up a white picket fence ? Adopt Tiger and become the lovin' male role model ? That's not me. It's not Payne !

Major Payne

Video-background
1m25s
You're a no good heartbreaker You're a liar and you're a cheat And I don't know why I let you do these things to me My friends keep tellin' me That you ain't no good Oh-h-h-h but they don't know That I'd leave you if I could I guess I'm uptight And I'm stuck like glue 'Cause I ain't never I ain't never I ain't never no, no Loved a man the way-- I can't believe he actually left. Alex, where are you going ? To the games. You guys better start getting ready. We gotta be there in an hour. We don't have to go to the games. Payne's gone. We don't have a chance without Payne. Listen, Payne or no Payne, I'm gonna go out there and win that stupid trophy. We busted our asses off out there gettin' ready for this. Now I didn't go through all that to come out empty-handed.

Major Payne

Video-background
21.5s
So how 'bout it, guys ? You with me ? - Uh, I'm-- - Sure. - Yeah. - I can't hear you ! - Sir, yes, sir ! Just a little bit louder now. Sir, yes, sir ! One more time, you maggots. Sir, yes, sir-r-r-r !

Major Payne

Video-background
4.9s
Taggert, present arms. Stapleton, present arms !

Major Payne

Video-background
2.2s
Wellington, present arms !

Major Payne

Video-background
6s
Madison, present arms ! Cadets, order arms !

Major Payne

Video-background
21.3s
Welcome, men, to Wellington Academy, to the 58th annual Junior R.O.T.C. Virginia Military Games. This morning, you are all equal. But by the end of the day today, we will honor the finest of you with a trophy. The trophy of a champion. Let the games begin !

Major Payne

Video-background
13s
Good shot, Williams. I got nothin' to say to you. All right, Fox. Keep goin'. Yes ! Come on, guys ! Maggots ! Pull !

Major Payne

Video-background
2.9s
Go, Tiger ! Go !

Major Payne