Found 789 results
40.6s
Hmph. [Sighs] I'm sorry. I guess I am just a big, stupid, ugly ogre. Can you forgive me? Hey, that's what friends are for, right? Right. Friends? Friends. So, um, what did Fiona say about me? What are you asking me for? Why don't you just go ask her? The wedding! We'll never make it in time. Ha-ha-ha! Never fear, for where there's a will, there's a way, and I have a way. [Whistles]
Shrek
1m51s
Donkey? - [Grunts] - What are you doing? I would think, of all people, you would recognise a wall when you see one. Well, yeah. But the wall's supposed to go around my swamp, not through it. It is around your half. See, that's your half, and this is my half. Oh! Your half. Hmm. Yes, my half. I helped rescue the princess. I did half the work, I get half the booty. Now hand me that big old rock, the one that looks like your head. - Back off! - No, you back off. - This is my swamp! - Our swamp. - Let go, Donkey! - You let go. - Stubborn jackass! - Smelly ogre. Fine! - Hey, come back here. I'm not through with you yet. - Well, I'm through with you. Uh-uh. You know, with you it's always, Me, me, me! Well, guess what! Now it's my turn! So you just shut up and pay attention! You are mean to me. You insult me and you don't appreciate anything that I do! You're always pushing me around or pushing me away. Oh, yeah? Well, if I treated you so bad, how come you came back? Because that's what friends do! They forgive each other! Oh, yeah. You're right, Donkey. I forgive you... for stabbing me in the back! Ohh! You're so wrapped up in layers, onion boy, you're afraid of your own feelings. - Go away! - There you are, doing it again just like you did to Fiona. All she ever do was like you, maybe even love you. Love me? She said I was ugly, a hideous creature. I heard the two of you talking. She wasn't talking about you. She was talking about, uh, somebody else. She wasn't talking about me? Well, then who was she talking about? Uh-uh, no way. I am not saying anything. You don't wanna listen to me. - Right? Right? - Donkey! - No! - Okay, look. I'm sorry, all right?
Shrek
1m9s
Lord Farquaad, I accept. Nothing would make-- Excellent! I'll start the plans, for tomorrow we wed! No! I mean, uh, why wait? Let's get married today before the sun sets. Oh, anxious, are we? You're right. The sooner, the better. There's so much to do! There's the caterer, the cake, the band, the guest list. Captain, round up some guests! [Fiona] Fare-thee-well, ogre. Shrek, what are you doing? You're letting her get away. - Yeah? So what? - Shrek, there's something about her you don't know. Look, I talked to her last night. She's-- I know you talked to her last night. You're great pals, aren't ya? Now, if you two are such good friends, why don't you follow her home? Shrek, I-- I wanna go with you. I told you, didn't I? You're not coming home with me. I live alone! My swamp! Me! Nobody else! Understand? Nobody! Especially useless, pathetic, annoying, talking donkeys! - But I thought-- - Yeah. You know what? You thought wrong!
Shrek
2m2s
Shrek, wait, wait! Wait a minute! - You wanna do this right, don't you? - What are you talking about? There's a line you gotta wait for. The preacher's gonna say, Speak now or forever hold your peace. - That's when you say, I object! - I don't have time for this! Wait. What are you doing? Listen to me! - Look, you love this woman, don't you? - Yes. - You wanna hold her? - Yes. - Please her? - Yes! Then you got to, got to try a little tenderness - The chicks love that romantic crap! - All right! Cut it out. - When does this guy say the line? - We gotta check it out. - [Donkey Grunting] - And so, by the power vested in me, - [Shrek] What do you see? - The whole town's in there. - I now pronounce you husband and wife, - They're at the altar. - king and queen. - Mother Fletcher! He already said it. - Oh, for the love of Pete! - [Grunts] I object! - Shrek? - [Gasps] Oh, now what does he want? [Crowd Clamouring] Hi, everyone. Having a good time, are ya? I love DuLoc, first of all. - Very clean. - What are you doing here? Really, it's rude enough being alive when no one wants you, -but showing up uninvited to a wedding-- -Fiona! - I need to talk to you. - Oh, now you wanna talk? It's a little late for that, so if you'll excuse me-- - But you can't marry him. - And why not? Because-- Because he's just marrying you so he can be king. Outrageous! Fiona, don't listen to him. - He's not your true love. - And what do you know about true love? Well, I-- Uh-- - I mean-- - Oh, this is precious. [Chuckling] The ogre has fallen in love with the princess! - Oh, good Lord. - [Crowd Laughing] An ogre and a princess! [Laughing Continues] Shrek, is this true? Who cares? It's preposterous! Fiona, my love, we're but a kiss away from our happily ever after. Now kiss me! Mmmm!
Shrek
55.2s
Uh-- - Really tall? - No! I'm an ogre. You know. Grab your torch and pitchforks. Doesn't that bother you? Nope. - Really? - Really, really. - Oh. - Man, I like you. What's your name? Uh, Shrek. Shrek? Well, you know what I like about you, Shrek? You got that kind of I-don't-care-what-nobody- thinks-of-me thing. I like that. I respect that, Shrek. You all right. Whoo! Look at that. Who'd want to live in a place like that? That would be my home. Oh! And it is lovely! Just beautiful. You are quite a decorator. It's amazing what you've done with such a modest budget. I like that boulder. That is a nice boulder.
Shrek
32.9s
Arrgh! I'll make you regret the day we met. I'll see you drawn and quartered! - You'll beg for death to save you! - No! Shrek! - And as for you, my wife, - Fiona! I'll have you locked back in that tower for the rest of your days! - I am king! - [Whistles] I will have order! I will have perfection! I will have-- Aaah! - Aah! - All right. Nobody move. I got a dragon here, and I'm not afraid to use it. - [Dragon Roars] - I'm a donkey on the edge!
Shrek
44.1s
Can I say something to you? Listen, you was really, really something back there. Incredible! Are you talking to-- me? Whoa! Yes, I was talking to you. Can I tell you that you was great back there? Those guards! They thought they was all of that. Then you showed up, and bam! They was tripping over themselves like babes in the woods. That really made me feel good to see that. - Oh, that's great. Really. - Man, it's good to be free. Now, why don't you go celebrate your freedom with your own friends? Hmm? But, uh, I don't have any friends. And I'm not going out there by myself. Hey, wait a minute! I got a great idea! I'll stick with you. You're a mean, green, fighting machine. Together we'll scare the spit out of anybody that crosses us.
Shrek
2m12s
My beloved monster and me We go everywhere together Wearing a raincoat that has four sleeves - Gets us through all kinds of weather - Aah! She will always be the only thing That comes between me and the awful sting That comes from living in a world that's so damn mean [Croaks] Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh Hey! - La-la, la-la, la-la-la-la - [Both Laughing] La-la, la-la, la-la There it is, Princess. Your future awaits you. - That's DuLoc? - Yeah, I know. You know, Shrek thinks Lord Farquaad's compensating for something, which I think means he has a really-- Ow! Um, I, uh-- - I guess we better move on. - Sure. But, Shrek? - I'm-- I'm worried about Donkey. - [Blubbering] - What? - I mean, look at him. - He doesn't look so good. - What are you talking about? I'm fine. That's what they always say, and then next thing you know, you're on your back. - Dead. - You know, she's right. You look awful. Do you want to sit down? - I'll make you some tea. - I didn't want to say nothing, but I got this twinge in my neck, and when I turn my head like this, look. - [Bones Crunch] - Ow! See? -Who's hungry? I'll find us some dinner. -I'll get the firewood. Hey, where you going? Oh, man, I can't feel my toes! I don't have any toes! I think I need a hug.
Shrek
1m39s
- Is that you, Gorder? - How did you know? Enough! What are you doing in my house? [Grunts] Hey! - [Snickers] - Oh, no, no, no. - Dead broad off the table. - Where are we supposed to put her? The bed's taken. Huh? [Gasps] [Male Voice] What? I live in a swamp. I put up signs. I'm a terrifying ogre! What do I have to do to get a little privacy? - Aah! - Oh, no. Oh, no. - No! No! - [Cackling] - [Cackling Continues] - What? - Quit it. - Don't push. - [Squeaking] - [Lows] What are you doing in my swamp? [Echoing] Swamp! Swamp! Swamp! - [Gasping] - Oh, dear! Whoa! All right, get out of here. All of you, move it! Come on! Let's go! Hapaya! Hapaya! Hey! - Quickly. Come on! - No, no! No, no. Not there. Not there. - Oh! - [Sighs] Hey, don't look at me. I didn't invite them. Oh, gosh, no one invited us. - What? - We were forced to come here. - By who? - Lord Farquaad. He huffed und he puffed und he... signed an eviction notice. [Sighs] All right. Who knows where this Farquaad guy is? - [Murmuring] - Oh, I do. I know where he is. Does anyone else know where to find him?
Shrek