You need to seriously ease up on the bedazzling. They're jeans, not a chandelier. P.S. I'm keeping your wallet. You did kinda give it to me. Okay, just look, man, can I have my Sam's card... I will shoot your fucking cat!
Deadpool
2.6s
I don't really know what that means. I don't have a cat.
Deadpool
1.2s
(GROANING LOUDLY)
Deadpool
4.7s
That is a no go on the tiperoo, Jer. I'm not here for him.
Deadpool
1.2s
You're not Francis.
Deadpool
1.2s
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Deadpool
2.9s
WADE: I did! (TOILET FLUSHING)
Deadpool
11.7s
Threats hurt, Jer. Though not nearly as badly as serrated steel. So keep away from Meghan. Cool? Yes, sir. Then we're done.
Deadpool
1.2s
(GROANS)
Deadpool
7.2s
Residents are advised to remain in their homes. The assailant appears to be armed, dangerous, and wearing... a red suit. A red suit.
Deadpool
2.4s
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Deadpool
1.4s
(GROANING)
Deadpool
12.2s
MERCHANT: Look, would it help if I slow it down for you? I didn't order the pizza. Is this 7348 Red Ledge Drive? Are you Mr. Merchant? Yeah, the Mr. Merchant who didn't order the fucking pie!
Deadpool
2.4s
(GUN COCKS) Oh!
Deadpool
15.4s
You know, for a mere, you're pretty warm-blooded. Ibetyoulet the kid off easy, too. Oh, he's not a bad kid, Weas. Just a little light stalking. I was way worse than him when I was his age. I was traveling to exotic places... Baghdad, Mogadishu, Jacksonville, meeting new and exciting people. And then, uh...
Deadpool
4.8s
MAN: Whoa! Took his ass out! WEASEL: All right, move. Move, move, move. Buck, go rest.
Deadpool
12.3s
So what was Special Forces doing in Jacksonville, anyway? That's classified. (WHISPERS) They have a wonderful TGl Fridays. All right, Kahlua, Baileys and... whipped cream. I give you a Blow Job.
Deadpool
2.7s
Sir, before you do anything to him, do you mind if I get a big tip?
