Found 722 results
Don't ever lose her again.
Ted
Well, as it turned out, John picked the perfect night to make a wish.
Ted
Okay, here's a test to see how much you actually care about me.
Ted
Oh. Is that a Flash Gordon ray gun, or are you just happy to see me?
Ted
(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)
Ted
TED: Stick your finger in the loop of my tag.
Ted
And it reminds me that things aren't so bad.
Ted
Oh, shit, hang on a second.
Ted
It'll be great when it's furnished. Yeah, and the guy said it ain't hardly had no murders in it. So, that's good.
Ted
This is the first time that you've been single in all the years you've worked here.
Ted
Woody Harrelson. Smallest dick I've ever seen on a man. (BOTH LAUGHING)
Ted
