This is Wade Boggs' autographed bat. I just barely outbid Phil Donahue for that at auction. Wow, cool. Yeah, cool. These boxing gloves were worn by Joe Louis in his first fight.
Ted
12s
Did you ever hear a Boston girl have an orgasm? (IN BOSTON ACCENT) Oh, yeah, oh, yeah! Harder! Harder! Oh, God, that was so good! Now I'm going to stuff my fucking face with Pepperidge Farm!
Ted
8.7s
Lori was right about you. You cannot take responsibility for anything that goes on in your life. Oh, and you can? I don't have to. I'm a fucking teddy bear.
Ted
5s
I'll be back in 30 minutes tops, okay? But Lori cannot find out. She absolutely cannot know I was gone.
Ted
2.8s
Do I need to wash my hands before I play this game?
Ted
1.5s
I heard you got busted.
Ted
1.8s
Come on, buddy.
Ted
1.5s
No, it doesn't.
Ted
11.8s
We are going to party like the '80s. Show us how, Flash. It's easy. We just gotta nail a lot of girls named Stephanie. God, Johnny, I got so much energy. We better start doing stupid shit.
Ted
5.8s
I know I didn't take our relationship seriously but, Lori, I do love you more than life itself.
Ted
2.4s
Can you just email me the rest of this story?
Ted
2.2s
It's okay, I'll drive you. I feel fine.
Ted
1.7s
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
Ted
3.6s
Yeah. I did wish for it.
Ted
1.6s
I promise.
Ted
1.9s
Oh, my God!
Ted
1.3s
(COUGHS)
Ted
13.1s
How great is this? The four of us out to dinner. How long have we been saying we were going to... Lori, how you doing? I haven't talked to you in forever. I'm good. I'm good. The company's having their 20th anniversary party next week. So, that's something.
