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2.5s

Uh, I was able to sniff that out, yeah.

Ted 2

2.4s

Uh,yeah,yeah. Box of Trix.

Ted 2

17.4s

Maybe we don't want you now. Shut up. No, yeah, we want you. For sure, we want you. What made you change your mind? Well, when I saw what John did for you, that he was willing to give his life for yours, it gave me a kick in the ass. Reminded me of why I chose to do the kind of work I do.

Ted 2

6.9s

And no matter how many of you smart-ass Harvard lawyers try to keep him down, you're not gonna change that. Not in our eyes. Ted is real.

Ted 2

9s

You're very lucky. I saw what you did on TV. Yeah, he saved my ass is what he did. You know why? Because he's a person.

Ted 2

3.8s

I'm sorry I turned you away. I was wrong.

Ted 2

2.9s

You mean it? I certainly do.

Ted 2

3.1s

So, shall we get started?

Ted 2

1.9s

What defines property?

Ted 2

1.6s

Sure, yeah.

Ted 2

14.6s

What are you talking about? You're the one who needs the sperm. Yeah, but it's got to be a human hand. It's got to be skin on skin, otherwise it doesn't work. No, it doesn't. It's just friction. Look, I've never done this before. Neither have I. You do it to yourself. Yeah, but that's different. You're an adult with a poster of this guy in your fucking room. You're telling me you don't want this?

Ted 2

1.7s

Or a piece of property?

Ted 2

3.4s

Suddenly, being human doesn't seem so special anymore, does it?

Ted 2

2.8s

You see, Your Honor? He's not an animal.

Ted 2

18.8s

(SCOFFS) Now, come on! Are any of you gonna sit there and tell me that this stuffed doll is a person? No. Not at all. We all agree all the time. I don't think he should want to be considered a person. After all, you know, Ted spent many years sleeping and cuddling with a child. That's cute when you're a stuffed animal. When you're a person, that's a felony. (AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

Ted 2

1.7s

TED TOY VOICE: I love you!

Ted 2

15s

FEMALE NEWSCASTER: Also in the news, a pending court case is beginning to get national attention for its civil rights ramifications. Ted, the bear, who some of you may remember came to life back in the mid-'80s right here in Boston, is suing to prove he is indeed a person.

Ted 2

20.2s

FUCK you! Hey, Ted! Come on! I'm sorry. He doesn't mean that. Please forgive me, I'm sorry. There's just no indication that you've had any positive effect on the world around you. Well, that's not true. He's had a positive effect on me. Would that positive effect be yourjoint arrest for purchasing marijuana in 2003? Well, how the fuck do you prepare for a Foo Fighters concert?

Ted 2

Found 785 results

Uh, I was able to sniff that out, yeah.

Uh,yeah,yeah. Box of Trix.

Maybe we don't want you now. Shut up. No, yeah, we want you. For sure, we want you. What made you change your mind? Well, when I saw what John did for you, that he was willing to give his life for yours, it gave me a kick in the ass. Reminded me of why I chose to do the kind of work I do.

And no matter how many of you smart-ass Harvard lawyers try to keep him down, you're not gonna change that. Not in our eyes. Ted is real.

You're very lucky. I saw what you did on TV. Yeah, he saved my ass is what he did. You know why? Because he's a person.

I'm sorry I turned you away. I was wrong.

You mean it? I certainly do.

So, shall we get started?

What defines property?

Sure, yeah.

Or a piece of property?

Suddenly, being human doesn't seem so special anymore, does it?

You see, Your Honor? He's not an animal.

TED TOY VOICE: I love you!

FEMALE NEWSCASTER: Also in the news, a pending court case is beginning to get national attention for its civil rights ramifications. Ted, the bear, who some of you may remember came to life back in the mid-'80s right here in Boston, is suing to prove he is indeed a person.