Found 1049 results
26s
- So you're going to Michigan next year? - Yeah. My parents want me to go to Northwestern, but... I don't wanna write all those extra essays they make you do. I mean, how am I supposed to know what my "most emotionally significant moment" was? So when my "U" of "M" acceptance came in December, I just said the hell with it. - Onions? - What? You, uh, want onions? Oh, no, thank you.
American Pie
21.9s
27.8s
Stifler's mom got it in the divorce. That reminds me of this one time... Hey, can I ask you a question? How come you don't have any stories? I've got lots of them, and you don't have any. Oh, I've got stories. Believe me. They're just, uh... They're just a little more risque than tales of band camp. Are they gross or something? Like guy stuff? Tell me! Okay. You want a story? Here's a story. Stifler finds this beer...
American Pie
39.2s
No, we shouldn't be. You know, I put in months of quality time with Vicky. Sherman meets a chick for one night and scores. - This is just wrong. - No shit. How the hell am I supposed to become Mr. Sensitive Man? You know, we're all gonna go to college as virgins. You realize this, right? I mean, they probably have special dorms for people like us. All right. I got an idea. But it's got to stay between us. It's really simple. We just got to make an agreement. Er, nah. It's... It's more than an agreement. - What? A bet? - A pact. No money involved. More important than any bet. Here's the deal. We all get laid before we graduate.
American Pie
31.6s
Excuse me. Uh, that's Paul Finch, right? - Yeah. - Well, you've seen him in the locker room, right? - Uh, yeah. - So, my friends, they want to know. Is it true? You know, that he's... equipped. I have no idea. Finch showers with his bathing suit on. I mean, uh... As a matter of fact, it is true. The guy's huge! - Does he have a date for the prom yet? - No, definitely not. All right. Thanks.
American Pie
1m29s
Hey, what are you doin' here? Just enjoying my first exhilarating lacrosse experience. - You kicked butt. - Oh, thanks. - Um, Chris... - Oh, you can call me Oz, if you want. - Do I have to? - You can call me Ostreicher. - What's your middle name? - Nah, forget it. - Come on. I won't tell anyone. - Well, neither will I. Okay. Um. So, I had this thought and... It may seem like it's way out of left field. I don't know if you can, but since I'm not going with anybody, I thought that maybe... Those guys sucked ass! Choir chick, what the hell are you doing here? Well, uh, I was asking Chris to prom. So, do you want to go? Oh, yeah! That would be great. Well, just don't expect Oz to pay for the limo! Stifler, fuck! I mean... Why do you got to be so insensitive all the time? What? Whatever. Look, uh, don't forget. My cottage after prom. On Lake Michigan. Hey, wait up, you pussies. Where you goin'? Ah, well, I gotta... I gotta hit the showers now, but I think this is gonna be really, really good. - Yeah. Me too. - All right. - Bye. - Bye. Bye.
American Pie