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27.1s

I can't argue against the infraction. I was responsible for that party, so what happened was my fault. I'm here to lay myself at the mercy of this court... and suggest an alternative punishment. Make me graduate. If you'll kindly take a look at my transcripts... you'll see I'm 18 units from graduating with a leisure studies degree. I am pleading to this committee, reinstate me. Let me audit my last six classes, take the finals... and leave Coolidge with a degree.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

17.8s

We are now in session. Mr. Wilder. You were found in violation of Article 2, Section B of Coolidge's bylaws-- soliciting of alcohol to extreme minors... which is grounds for immediate expulsion. You have opted to appeal. The floor is yours.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

11.3s

What are the courses Mr. Wilder needs in order to graduate? Biology, English Lit, Calculus, Economics... - Sociology and Political Science. - Wow. - That's quite a load. - Well, Van can handle quite a load.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

14.8s

God, I've bled... crimson and blue for nearly a decade. This school has given me so much. Let me repay Coolidge... by parting ways as a graduate.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

14.7s

Ladies and gentlemen... as you know... I've been a student here for seven years, and I've-- Let Van stay! Let Van stay!

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.3s

Order! Order! Settle down, everyone.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

14.5s

"Oh, I kept the first for another day. Yet knowing how way leads on to way... I doubted if I should ever come back." I want you to tell me what Robert Frost was trying to express here. I'm gonna need at least one more booklet.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

6.7s

My dad just didn't see me as a sound investment anymore. But he gave up on me and my mom long before I ever came here.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

15.7s

Gotta go. Sorry. Bye. Bye-bye. Call me. Gentlemen. Trooper. We got an anonymous tip that there's some underage drinking going on here. Hutch? Hell no, man. I've been at the door all night.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

13.9s

She's smart, she's beautiful... she can skate. She's not for you, dude. She's too high-strung. Besides, babes that fine-- they're way into themselves and shit.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.2s

Too bad she's dating Strapper John, MD.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.7s

Thanks for the good time, fellas.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

20.9s

A dilemma has arose up front. - Don't know if we got our point across. - Crystal clear, guys. - This is incredible. - 100 percent. Don't go anywhere. Seriously. Van is a godsend. I would have paid him way more than a grand for this party. I would have cashed in my Israel bonds. - How do you put a price on dignity? - How do you put a price on poonani? - Yes! - Oh, God!

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

34.9s

- He'll call you back. - Unbelievable. Van Wilder's phone. - Terrible. - I think so. Yeah. - Hang on. - Unbelievable. Van's room. Saturday night, yeah. That's-- How did you-- From the paper? Yeah, that's fine! Okay, thanks. - No problem confirming. Bye. - This writing, it's just-- I was just wondering if you could... slam the door in my face. Van, you must listen to me. Because of her article, everybody wants to have a party thrown by Van Wilder... the party liaison. Your cash camel has arrived!

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

12.8s

Whoa. Trick or treat. What's going on? This vaginal discharge won't let us partake in the party. Graphic. I'm sure we can accommodate a few more, yeah? No can do. We're at maximum capacity.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

15.2s

- Let's get you some skates. - I'm not here to skate. For some reason, my editor thinks you're a story. What do you think? As a story, I think... you're a little soft. Wow, all this time I thought I was more to you than just some flaccid story.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.4s

Threatened? Please.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.6s

- Why? - I like it here.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

Found 361 results

We are now in session. Mr. Wilder. You were found in violation of Article 2, Section B of Coolidge's bylaws-- soliciting of alcohol to extreme minors... which is grounds for immediate expulsion. You have opted to appeal. The floor is yours.

What are the courses Mr. Wilder needs in order to graduate? Biology, English Lit, Calculus, Economics... - Sociology and Political Science. - Wow. - That's quite a load. - Well, Van can handle quite a load.

God, I've bled... crimson and blue for nearly a decade. This school has given me so much. Let me repay Coolidge... by parting ways as a graduate.

Ladies and gentlemen... as you know... I've been a student here for seven years, and I've-- Let Van stay! Let Van stay!

Order! Order! Settle down, everyone.

"Oh, I kept the first for another day. Yet knowing how way leads on to way... I doubted if I should ever come back." I want you to tell me what Robert Frost was trying to express here. I'm gonna need at least one more booklet.

My dad just didn't see me as a sound investment anymore. But he gave up on me and my mom long before I ever came here.

Gotta go. Sorry. Bye. Bye-bye. Call me. Gentlemen. Trooper. We got an anonymous tip that there's some underage drinking going on here. Hutch? Hell no, man. I've been at the door all night.

She's smart, she's beautiful... she can skate. She's not for you, dude. She's too high-strung. Besides, babes that fine-- they're way into themselves and shit.

Too bad she's dating Strapper John, MD.

Thanks for the good time, fellas.

Whoa. Trick or treat. What's going on? This vaginal discharge won't let us partake in the party. Graphic. I'm sure we can accommodate a few more, yeah? No can do. We're at maximum capacity.

- Let's get you some skates. - I'm not here to skate. For some reason, my editor thinks you're a story. What do you think? As a story, I think... you're a little soft. Wow, all this time I thought I was more to you than just some flaccid story.

Threatened? Please.

- Why? - I like it here.