It's offensive that I'm saying that you should be smart? Yes, it's offensive that I have to be the smart one all the time! I'm allowed to be just as irresponsible as you. Well, that's how it works! I'm the dumb guy, and you're the woman who's supposed to stop the dumb guy from doing dumb shit! Haven't you ever seen a fucking Kevin James movie? We can't both be Kevin James. I'm Kevin James! I have a little bit of Kevin James in me. Well, we can't both... Clearly, you're the one who knows better, so you should know better. You know that I'm not like that, and I've never been like that. Well, maybe you should be. That's never been me. Just because I'm a mom doesn't mean that I'm gonna change who I am. Well, just because I'm a father, it doesn't mean I can stop doing mushrooms with teenagers. Fine! Fine! Good. Good, then. Okay, Kevin, I don't think we're a good team anymore. The team is breaking up. Yep. This worked before we had Stella, but... Now it doesn't. It doesn't work anymore. Yeah, because someone refuses to grow up. Fine. Okay. Fine then. You go find your nagging wife that you want to find, and I'll go find a real man. Fine! Good to know. Fine. I don't feel safe here, just in case you didn't know. Well, that's crazy. I'm gonna take our child and go. Oh, yeah? Well, that's ludicrous, because this is perhaps the safest place on the planet, just so you know! You're kidnapping our baby! Asshole! Don't kidnap our baby! I'm gonna put out an AMBER fucking Alert! Enjoy the house by yourself, you child!
Neighbors
22.8s
We're at Burning Man! Burning Man! Hey! You guys should come here. Bring Stella! You can bring kids! Bring Stella! No. No, we're making a Stella calendar. Yeah, we got six months left. She's Heisenberg. She's Walter White. See'? You're such a lame-o! Don't be so fucking lame! Totally lame. It's awesome! It only gets better and better! I feel completely comfortable missing that party. Okay.
Neighbors
15.6s
I made some blue meth. It's Gatorade. Oh, perfect! Great. She's all ready to go. This is gonna be the best calendar yet. Look at that, sweetie. All right. Let's do it. Who's my little Heisenberg? You are! She's a little meth head. No, she just makes it. Oh...
Neighbors
5.9s
Yo. You here to ask us to turn the music down? Because that's not gonna happen. No, we're here to tell you to turn it up.
Neighbors
8.1s
It's like, I make... I'm a more obtainable goal. Yeah, you're like the relaxed-fit jean guy. Yeah. I'm the relaxed-fit jeans.
Neighbors
4.2s
Well played, motherfuckers. What the fuck are you looking at? What the fuck are y'all looking at?
I'm the President of a fraternity. You could be President of the United Nations. There is no President of the United Nations. Yeah, but see, that's my fucking point! You know shit like that, man! This is all my fault. You're not taking the heat for this. I fucking will, man.
Neighbors
12.6s
They're actually really good. They taste like vanilla, kinda. They're awesome. Pudgie, what do you got there? Moving truck. Moving truck. There's a moving truck. Wow. Who do you think... Come on. Oh, my God. Look, look, look.
Neighbors
4.4s
I fucking love you, man. Get out of here. Be in this moment! Live in this shit with me!