Duration: 1m8s

It's offensive that I'm saying that you should be smart? Yes, it's offensive that I have to be the smart one all the time! I'm allowed to be just as irresponsible as you. Well, that's how it works! I'm the dumb guy, and you're the woman who's supposed to stop the dumb guy from doing dumb shit! Haven't you ever seen a fucking Kevin James movie? We can't both be Kevin James. I'm Kevin James! I have a little bit of Kevin James in me. Well, we can't both... Clearly, you're the one who knows better, so you should know better. You know that I'm not like that, and I've never been like that. Well, maybe you should be. That's never been me. Just because I'm a mom doesn't mean that I'm gonna change who I am. Well, just because I'm a father, it doesn't mean I can stop doing mushrooms with teenagers. Fine! Fine! Good. Good, then. Okay, Kevin, I don't think we're a good team anymore. The team is breaking up. Yep. This worked before we had Stella, but... Now it doesn't. It doesn't work anymore. Yeah, because someone refuses to grow up. Fine. Okay. Fine then. You go find your nagging wife that you want to find, and I'll go find a real man. Fine! Good to know. Fine. I don't feel safe here, just in case you didn't know. Well, that's crazy. I'm gonna take our child and go. Oh, yeah? Well, that's ludicrous, because this is perhaps the safest place on the planet, just so you know! You're kidnapping our baby! Asshole! Don't kidnap our baby! I'm gonna put out an AMBER fucking Alert! Enjoy the house by yourself, you child!