- Kiss me. - No, no, no. No talking. - All right, let me kiss a shoulder first. Okay. - Okay?
The Change-Up
5.7s
No. Don't apologize. I apologize. I probably came off a little gay last night.
The Change-Up
1.8s
Let's start again.
The Change-Up
12.7s
Do you not understand what we're trying to accomplish here? Not a drop of the red in the room. All the accents are celadon. It's like the opposite of help. Okay, honey, I got it. I'm going to tell you something that only I, Dave, would know.
The Change-Up
3.2s
Okay, when is our anniversary, Dave?
The Change-Up
15.1s
Three years ago, you took your vibrator... - You took your vibrator... - Morning! ...into the bathtub and it short-circuited and it electrocuted your vagina. Hang on. And there's now the cutest little bald spot right there.
The Change-Up
1.8s
- Red. - Celadon.
The Change-Up
24.3s
April 17th. Next question, please. Wrong. So close. Nineteenth. Seventeenth's your daughter's birthday, 19th's your anniversary. - Why do you know that? - Do you think I'm a monster? - I send you a card every year. - Jamie, listen to me. Ask me anything else. Oh, my gosh! Mitch, I don't have time for this! Come on, one more. Just make it tough. Only Dave would know. A stumper. Fine. What is my favorite color, Dave?
The Change-Up
3.2s
- Hello. - Hi, Mitch. It's Tatiana.
The Change-Up
3.3s
Okay. Daddy needs a time-out.
The Change-Up
4.2s
Dinner song Bye-bye.
The Change-Up
1.9s
Great idea.
The Change-Up
2.2s
- Get them to the kitchen. - Hold on.
The Change-Up
18.1s
I don't... Like, sixth grade. Well, that's disturbing. Gets me an extra inch, and only you married dudes rock the dick-froes. Now, let me ask you a question. If Tatiana was over earlier, why do you still have the need to jerk off? Tatiana. I don't think that she's going to be back for at least... She's never coming back, Mitch.
The Change-Up
5.9s
Stop crying. Jesus Christ. Shut up! I fucking hear you.
The Change-Up
4.5s
And then last night he told me that he wasn't attracted to me any more.
The Change-Up
12.8s
Jamie, Jamie... You guys are just going through a temporary rough patch right now. Temporary rough patch? What are you talking about? We've been in this for years.
The Change-Up
4.3s
You have? I love him. You know I love him with all of my heart.
