What are you doing? Somebody swiped right. [FAST-FORWARDING]
Deadpool 2
6.5s
[GROANS] Tell me they got that in slow motion. [DEADPOOL GROANS]
Deadpool 2
2s
[GUNS COCKING]
Deadpool 2
10.5s
Ugh. So gross. A panic room? Really? Can you come out? [WATCH BEEPING] I really have to go. It's my anniversary.
Deadpool 2
1.8s
Oh, man!
Deadpool 2
42s
[TIRES SCREECHING] [CRASHING] I'm gonna miss him. He seemed great. Whoo! Courage, motherfuckers! And karma, motherfucker. DEADPOOL: I could hear you coming the last 30 seconds. I could barely keep a straight face. [LAUGHS] I want some more. I bet you do, Brown Panther. We should leave before Fuckernaut wakes up. Good call. You guys coming with us? No, we'll get the kids back to the mansion. Besides, we're X-Men. No, you're X-People. You're exhausting. I see what you did there. Puns. Our door's always open. That's kind, but I'm not ready to date again. Let alone two women.
Deadpool 2
2.2s
Let's see Captain America do that.
Deadpool 2
1.2s
[SCREAMS]
Deadpool 2
1.5s
[ALL GRUNTING]
Deadpool 2
1.2s
[CROWD CHEERING]
Deadpool 2
4.3s
I'm gonna see you... [EXCLAIMS] at the office.
Deadpool 2
5.2s
Hurry up and open this fucking door, and let's kill this motherfucker! [ALARM RINGING] [GUNSHOT] [BODY THUDS]
Deadpool 2
1m37s
MAN: Shoot that motherfucker! Shoot him! Whoo! Oh, I shit my pants. Actually, that may have been me. Oh, mission accomplished? Oh, in a George W. sort of way. Fucker can't stay in a panic room forever. DOPINDER: Oh, you're living the dreams, DP. It has been quite the run, Dopinder, and who'da thought? Now I'm talked about in the same sentence as Jesus. Passion of the Christ, then me. At least domestically. We beat them overseas, where there's no such thing as religion. I do want to live the dreams, Pool Boy. Taxiing is not as sexy as it looks. I want to fill my... Pockets? What's your poison? A little, uh, cokey cokey? Can't maintain an erection without buying shoes online? [HORN HONKS] I've never experienced that last one. Talk to me, Goose. I was going to say "soul". I want to fill my soul. I want to belong to something, like you, Pool, sir. Dopinder... Hmm? You never cease to surprise me. You know, the depth of your heart is extraordinary. We all need a sense of belonging. We all need a genuine sense of home. A place in this world. I want to become a contract killer. I'm sorry. What did you say? Remember when I kidnapped Bandhu and threatened him with great violence? You kind of killed him. And then remember the movie Interview with the Vampire? Don't want to. When Tom Cruise fed 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst blood for the first time... and she looked up at his smooth, handsome face and said... "I want some more." Oh, Pool, picture me, a 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst. I'll never not picture that. But I can't wait to never speak of this, as soon as possible. We're here. [BRAKES SCREECHING]
Deadpool 2
2.7s
Whoo! Do not go in there!
Deadpool 2
18.7s
MAN: [ON RADIO] Over and over, I hear people say, "I just don't have enough confidence." Listen, confidence is not something you have. It's something you create. [LAUGHS] And you can create it at any moment in time. A sense of confidence is nothing but a sense of power within yourself... a sense of certainty that you can pull something off. DEADPOOL: Start the fucking car! Dopinder! Start the fucking car!
Deadpool 2
40.5s
DEADPOOL: My world tour brought me home to this guy, Sergei Valishnikov. But we'll get to him in a moment. 'Cause I know what you're thinking. "I'm so glad I left the kiddos at home." But that's where you'd be wrong. That babysitter of yours is high as fuck right now... and, believe it or not, Deadpool 2 is a family film. True story. And every good family film starts with a vicious murder. Bambi, The Lion King, Saw 7. [CHUCKLING] Holy shit pickles! That guy's on fire. That's not CGI, folks. He's actually on fire. Yeah. You know I get paid to take out bad guys, right? But this guy? He was one of the worst of 'em.
Deadpool 2
1.8s
What is it? What's wrong?
Deadpool 2
19.5s
Can you see it? Do you see that beautiful bright light? There it is. Oh, that's the sun. Don't stare directly into that. I just have a few final words. [EXHALES]