National Lampoon's Van Wilder

National Lampoon's Van Wilder is a 2002 comedy film directed by Walt Becker and written by Brent Goldberg and David T. Wagner. The film stars Ryan Reynolds as the title character alongside Tara Reid, Kal Penn, and Tim Matheson. The film follows the misadventures of its lead character, Van Wilder, a seventh-year senior who has made it his life goal to help undergrads at Coolidge College succeed in the future. After an article is written about his legacy by fellow student, Gwen Pearson (played by Reid), Van Wilder's party lifestyle is brought to light. This attracts the attention of Wilder's father, played by Matheson, who cuts off his tuition. Wilder becomes stuck in the middle of a love triangle between Gwen and her mean-spirited boyfriend, Richard Bagg while struggling to graduate. He tries various schemes to earn enough money to pay his tuition and graduate, with help from Gwen and the rest of the student body, except for a couple of sinister enemies who attempt to sabotage his efforts. The film received mostly negative reviews from critics but was popular with audiences. The film grossed $21,305,259 at the US box office; $16,970,224 at the international box office; and $38,275,483 overall, thus making it a box-office success. A sequel, Van Wilder: The Rise of Taj, was released on December 1, 2006. A prequel, Van Wilder: Freshman Year, was released straight-to-DVD on July 14, 2009. The movie is loosely based on a Rolling Stone article featuring comedian Bert Kreischer.

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Cytosine. Nothin' but net, my man. Now remember, before any final, take a pregame dump.

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Thanks for coming in. You did a great job, really. Richard! I was just talking about you. Hey, surprise. I'm on your oral exam board. Look, come in here. I want you to meet your future alumni. - I gotta go-- - No, come on. It's a great time. Look, it's Richard. Finished his written exam in only 20 minutes. This kid is a dynamo. Richard, I want you to meet Dr. Stern. Dr. Fine. It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Bagg. I've heard a lot about you.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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- Dr. Brown. - This is something of a formality. We just want to get to know you better. And Dr. Smelnick.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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Richard, is there something you want to say? You look like you want to get something out, son.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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Oh, my God! - Vile. - Oh, it burns!

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I'm bleeding!

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Dear God, that's wretched.

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"Oh, I kept the first for another day. Yet knowing how way leads on to way... I doubted if I should ever come back." I want you to tell me what Robert Frost was trying to express here. I'm gonna need at least one more booklet.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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- What? - In other school news... we have an update on the "Wilder Watch." The rigorous day has been a success for Van the man. Five finals in the can with Professor McDoogle's advanced econ final to go.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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Van! Van, wake up, wake up, wake up. - Your final's in exactly seven minutes! - All right.

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It's the moment of truth, people.

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I'm so glad you could fit us into your schedule this morning. Wouldn't miss it for the world, sir.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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All right. Pass these out. Thank you.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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It's getting to be that time of the hour.

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And your time is up, Mr. Wilder. Pencils down.

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- Thank you. - For four years... I have been grooming myself for the real world. I, like many, define the real world as stuff that happens after graduation. But I was wrong. It took a man by the name of Van Wilder to teach me that. You've all undoubtedly been to one of Van's parties. He's probably touched your life in some way, whether you know it or not. Watch Van do belly flops into a pool... but make sure you see he's raised $5,000 to give the swim team a next season. As you're all aware, Van was almost expelled. What you probably don't know is that he was set up... by a pathetic, egomaniacal frat boy... one who this reporter knows firsthand to have a serious problem... with premature ejaculation. And in reaction to this lynching... Van put in more effort in six days than most have all semester. Win or lose, we should thank him for reminding us what we're all capable of. That's simply what he does-- he inspires the uninspired.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

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Van. Hurry. The night of fun and fornication's upon us. Hey, have you heard from Gwen?

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No, she-- she hasn't yet called back. Right. I'll be down in a minute, okay? - Okay. - See ya, V.

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Jesus. This is some pad you got here. Decorated in early fuck.

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Well, I made it a point to personally come down here, Wilder. I wanted to give you the results of your test firsthand. And just as I expected... you succeeded. - Ninety-one percent. - What?

National Lampoon's Van Wilder