Your Honor, I'd like to call Ted Clubber Lang to the stand. Yes!
Ted 2
12.4s
I'm nervous that you're going to be swayed by smooth talk and a haircut, and forget about the most important aspect of this case.
Ted 2
7.7s
A hundred and fifty years ago a slave by the name of Dred Scott sued to prove that he was a person and not a piece of property.
Ted 2
6s
And not because some of you might laugh at the fact that I'm representing a teddy bear. (SOFT LAUGHTER)
Ted 2
8s
Ted, do you love your wife? Objection. She's not his wife. The marriage was annulled. I'll rephrase.
Ted 2
4.3s
Yeah, I was just gonna say it's sort of like this other batch we had called "How Long Has That Van Been There?"
Ted 2
3.7s
So what do you say? Can you get me my life back? (BUBBLING)
Ted 2
4.2s
And as history has shown us, that waswtjustice.
Ted 2
2.3s
Don't wait too long to be right.
Ted 2
2.9s
Erection. Sustained.
Ted 2
1.7s
(INHALING)
Ted 2
1.4s
"Justice."
Ted 2
1.2s
Leslie.
Ted 2
13.6s
Sorry. No. This is nice. You know? I always wanted my ex-wife to get stoned with me. She never would. Really? Wow. That's the cornerstone of any great marriage. I agree. (BOTH CHUCKLE)
Ted 2
10.4s
Mr. Meighan, this is such an honor. Thank you so much for meeting with us. Not at all. It's my pleasure. Please, sit down. Oh, this office is fucking awesome. Yeah, totally. Hey, hey.
