What do you want, Mister Pee-body ? Oh, he's upset about this morning. Apparently he had a little accident. Apparently he pissed all over the front of his pants. Well, maybe that's because he's six. 'Cause he's six ? Woman, when I was six years old I had a full-time job.
Major Payne
17.4s
I see we have a sickly boy on our hands. We're gonna have to boost your immune system, son ! Drop down, give me 25 pushups now ! - Count 'em out ! - One, sir. - Two, sir.
Major Payne
28.9s
It's been two whole weeks since I killed me a man, and already I'm startin' to get the itch. Problem is I ain't got nothin' to scratch. God, I'm hungry. Hungry for action. - Hungry for blood. Hell. I'm just plain ol' hungry.
Major Payne
9.3s
Meet me on the parade ground, 1700 hours. We got work to do. Squad, atten-hut !
Major Payne
1m1s
Why are you here ? The R.O.T.C. program. I understand you've been placin' last, eight years runnin' in the Virginia Military Games. - I am here to remedy that. We have an R.O.T.C. program ? - The green boys, sir. - Oh, right. Between us, I don't care what you do with those boys, as long as you keep them out of my hair. Is that all ? - Oh ! Would you like a tour of the campus ? No. I'd like to see my men. Fall in ! Move it, you idiots ! Let's go ! Come on, Williams ! Let's move it. Get a hop on it, boy ! Mo-o-o-o-ve ! Fall in, everyone ! Fall in ! Let's go ! Come on, people ! Mo-o-o-ve ! Hustle, hustle, hustle ! Let's go. Giddyap ! Giddyap, let's go !
Major Payne
33.6s
- Feel I'm gettin' weaker... while Charlie's growin' stronger in the jungle. I can't lose my edge. I gotta keep my strength up. I gotta maintain discipline. Because the hard reality was... I gotta get a job. - And what better place... than somewhere that would allow me to employ... my skills as a trained killer. Mister... Payne ?
Major Payne
2.1s
Mmm.
Major Payne
7.3s
Did I say you could touch my bed ? - No. - Get off. Ow !
Major Payne
17.3s
That's a mighty fine handshake you got there. - You wanna wrestle ? Uh, no thanks. I wrestle with these kids all day. This one's usually my big helper. Come on, Tiger. Nice meeting you, Major. Nice meetin' you, Miss Ma'am.
Major Payne
29.1s
Back to the sweet smell of mustard gas... and killin'. Little did I know what awaited for me. I've toured 11 separate engagements... from Iraq to Haiti, but nothin' I did would prepare me for this newest assignment. I was told it would be my greatest challenge. It was sure to be a living hell.
Major Payne
24.6s
What you runnin' from, boy ? She's tryin' to give me a shot ! You don't like needles ? You want me to show you a little trick take your mind off that pain ? Here, gimme your hand. Now, you may feel a little bit of pressure. Hi, I'm Emily Walburn, the school counselor. You must be Major Payne.
Major Payne
5.9s
Tiger ! Tiger, come back here ! I'm not gonna chase you.
Major Payne
2.7s
- Come in.
Major Payne
12.5s
Oh, that's great ! But is there anything that you like that doesn't have to do with battle ? - Like what ? - Like golf. Negative.
Major Payne
20.4s
So what is it, exactly ? Concentrated dithiazanine. - What the hell is that ? - It's like a super-laxative. This here'll pack enough punch to take out an entire football team. Payne'll never get off the can. He'll be makin' beef stool 'til graduation. - Yeah. - All right. Payne'll never know what hit him.
Major Payne
1m8s
What you want Baby, I got What you need You know I got it All I'm askin' - Is for a little respect when you come home - Just a little bit - Hey, baby - Just a little bit - When ya get home - Just a little bit - Mister - Just a little bit I ain't gonna do you wrong while you're gone I ain't gonna do you wrong 'cause I don't wanna All I'm askin' is for a little respect when you come home - Just a little bit just a little bit - Baby, when you get home And all I'm askin' in return, honey Is to give me my propers when you get home - Just a, just a, just a - Yeah, baby, when you get home - Just a little bit Just a little bit - Yeah Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight.
Major Payne
5.2s
Can't you see I'm eatin', turd ? There's a call for you, sir.
Major Payne
10.6s
So after two and a half weeks... of livin' a civilian puke's existence, I was back in uniform, back in the Corps.