Found 285 results
1m15s
Hey! Oh. Oh, oh, oh, you're so skinny. - Have you been eating? - Yeah. - Hi. - Hey. How are you? This is Ray. - Hey. How you doing? - Oh. - Nice to finally meet you. - Nice to meet you. Yeah, I feel like I already know you. Your mom talks about you all the time. - Oh, God. - Oh. No, only good stuff, only good stuff. Should we go eat? I am so sick of eating off a tray. - You hungry? - Yeah, I could eat. - Could always eat. - Uh-huh. Beautiful school. "Yeah, I could eat. I could always eat." Fucking asshole. Look at those two angels, huh? - Yeah, I know them. - Yeah. - Mm-hmm. - You walk them to school, don't you? - Yeah, I know who they are. - Oh, my God. - She's so cute. - Look. Look at those curls. We took them to see Stomp Off-Broadway. - They went crazy! - Oh, my God. I love Stomp. What's Stomp? What is that? It's the greatest musical of all time. Yeah, it's, like, that show where people play the drums on, like, garbage cans and, like, tap with broomsticks. - Stuff around the house. - Yeah. Like, you just see a toaster, we make an English muffin. They-they see a whole song. It's incredible. I know a homeless guy that plays trash can lids on the subway, for a dollar. And then he took a shit on the platform. Oh. Well, you know. I don't know if he's gonna get a Tony for that, but... Maybe if they keep practicing and get an adult diaper, they can, uh, get to Broadway someday.
The King of Staten Island
36.3s
What do you think about his tattoo restaurant idea? I think it's terrible. Getting a tattoo is like, uh... it's a medical procedure. You don't want to go to the hospital and order supper, you know? I just love that he has big dreams, but he's just so lost. I mean, no matter how much I try to fill him with good energy, he just... he's got no self-esteem. He's really going nowhere. Don't be so hard on yourself. Scientists have been doing studies. They say a lot of this stuff is genetic. You know, you inherit it from your grandparents. So blame them.
The King of Staten Island
39.5s
Mom doesn't need to peruse dick. - You know she needs to. - I think she seems happy. You want her to have sex with a ton of people? No, but, yeah, kind of. - I mean... - That's gross. Well, if you knew something was bad before it even started, wouldn't you stop it if you had the chance? It's like that whole baby Hitler thing, you know? If you had the chance to kill baby Hitler before it grew up, wouldn't you do it? Wouldn't you strangle it until its eyes popped out? So, Ray's baby Hitler? Yeah. In this situation, he is, yeah. He's baby Hitler. So, do you want to help me kill baby Hitler? Okay, you're right, Scott. You're right. - I'll see you tomorrow. - Claire! Claire!
The King of Staten Island
1m21s
That was fucking fun. I know. It was so fun. Yeah, like, I feel like, I feel like I kind of fit in for once, you know? And not everybody hated me for the first time. You should come here. Yeah? You think I can get into a place like this? I mean, you'd need a good GPA. Yeah, well, I don't have a good one of those. I-I didn't even graduate high school. Don't you have to graduate high school to go to college? Yeah, but it's not, like, too late to do that. All right, even so, you know, I-I'm a little too old. I'd look like a narc, you know? I would look creepy in the corner. Everybody'd be like, "What's that guy doing here?" Everybody here is so old. All right, well, I'm fucking stupid, Claire, okay? Is that what you want me to say? I can't pay attention. I can't sit still, okay? I'm stupid. I'm a dumb idiot. I would have to work ten times harder than those people. And everybody would fucking make fun of me, and I'm not ready to deal with that again, all right? So, no. So, that's it? Huh? That's how long you're gonna think about going to college for? I mean, that was, like, a 40-second walk. Uh, that's a lot of consideration, don't you think? Okay. - It's your journey. - Indeed. Now, let's get down to brass tacks, all right? W-What are we gonna do about Ray? - What do you mean? - Don't act stupid. I mean, h-how are we gonna, you know, get Mom to break up with him? I think he seems fine. - You think he's fine? - What do you want? It's Mom's choice to make. We don't need to get involved. Yeah, I know, but we should still protect her. She can't just be with the first guy she's been with since Dad. She got to, like, peruse some dick.
The King of Staten Island
1m6s
- We're gonna have a good night. - Oh, yeah. No, we're not. I hate college parties. You've never been to a college party. Come on, just enjoy it. - Relax. Go with it, okay? - Yes, relax. ♪ Five, four, three, two, I let one go, bow ♪ ♪ Get the fuck, though, I don't bluff, bro ♪ ♪ Aiming at your head like a buffalo ♪ ♪ What the fuck, though? Where the love go... ♪ What's your major? It's, uh, uh, evolutionary sociology with-with a splash of bio. Oh. I-I didn't know you could do that. Yeah, you can do whatever the fuck you want. It's college. ♪ I don't huff, though, yellow diamonds up close ♪ ♪ Catch a sunstroke ♪ ♪ At your front door with a gun stowed ♪ ♪ Put the green in the bag like a lawn mower ♪ ♪ Hair trigger pulled back like a cornrow ♪ ♪ What the fuck, bro? Where the love go? ♪ I like your tattoos. I'm an actress, so, like, I don't think I can get that many tattoos, because, like, what if I get cast as, like, an angelic role? Like, I'm kind of, like, a young Winona Ryder. So, like, I could play those parts, and, like, also, like, back when Shakespeare was writing plays, like... ♪ Five, four, three, two, I let one go ♪ ♪ Bow, get the fuck, though, I don't bluff, bro ♪ ♪ Aiming at your head like a buffalo ♪ - What do you think? - What is that?
The King of Staten Island
31.1s
What's going on?! What the fuck? - Who are you?! - You're not supposed to be here. What are you talking about?! It's my store! Who are you talking to? - Who is that?! - Go back inside. - Go back inside! - What? Don't tell me to go back inside! I'm handling this! Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. Yes. No. Get the fuck out of my store! - I just don't want to hurt you, okay? - Get out! - I just... - You're not doing this again, okay?! - This is the third time! - Enough of you guys! - Third time this year! - Shit! Shit! - Get out! - What the hell? - Get off me! - Not today! Not today! Today is Alan Moskowitz's day!
The King of Staten Island