I got him in the east wing. All right, we're on our way. Hold him.
Violent Night
20s
- It's Gertrude! - It's Mom. - Okay, let's do this. - Okay, okay. Come on. - Come on. Bert, get over here. - No. Mom. Mom! - Positions. - Game time, buddy. - Okay. Okay. - This is my good side. I'm busy. -ALVA: We've gone over this! Come on! Gosh. Okay. Bert, get in the middle. So it begins. Seriously, come. You know what that means. Shall we jockey forward? No.
Violent Night
12.7s
Parts of Asia, at least. We were in parts of Asia once, and, like, we couldn't even go to a restaurant. Ah, what is there a better gift than... gift of a golden opportunity?
Violent Night
13.8s
I'm telling you, no one hired a Santa. All right, all right, all right. You're right. You're right. Let's stop it. Let's stop it. What are we doing here? Come on. What are we, amateurs? We're half-assing this. Come on. It's not called a finger cracker.
Violent Night
3.2s
Are you okay, Santa?
Violent Night
16.9s
- Really? - Aw. What a way to find out that there's no Santa. Hey, let's come back Easter and ruin the Easter Bunny for her, too, huh? - Trudy! - Come back here! - Stop her! - Trudy! -Hey! You idiots, stay at your posts. Trudy! I'll find this little brat.
Violent Night
2.3s
- It's Christmas! - Yeah!
Violent Night
7.1s
Can you use your Christmas magic to make them love each other again? I wish I had that kind of power.
Violent Night
7.1s
Whew. Whew. This is Candy Cane checking in. Compound is clear and secured.
Violent Night
2.7s
Grown-ups have a hard time believing things.
Violent Night
12s
She got to stay up late and watch Home Alone. Uh-huh. It was so funny. - Yep. - That... that hurts. - All morning. - Okay, um... Thank you.
Violent Night
8.1s
I mean, Santa might have some magic, but... making a little girl fly?
Violent Night
2.9s
Don't be too hard on your parents, all right?
Violent Night
2.7s
Grown-up relationships are complicated.
Violent Night
10.8s
I am sorry about my sister. ♪ Making spirits bright ♪ ♪ What fun it is to ride and sing... ♪ It is really nice to see you.
Violent Night
4.2s
Santa's just a thing adults tell kids to make them feel better, okay?
Violent Night
32.7s
Okay, Candy Cane. Stick one of his bozaks in there. I'm not touching his balls. What, are you a princess all of a sudden? I've seen you scoop out brains before. You want me to scoop his brains out, I'll scoop his brains out right now, but I'm not touching his junk. I don't care who does it. I better be looking at flat balls, like, in three seconds. I'll do it. Krampus. Perfect. Oh, not that guy. Not that guy. That's what I love about sociopaths. Always up for trying new things. You don't need to do this, okay? No, it's all right. Um... Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, God. Oh, my God.
Violent Night
22.6s
To have you here. ♪ Jingle all the way... ♪ Okay, I'm behind. Catch me up on all the hot goss. Hot goss. Okay. Um, well, you remember Bert, my sister's pride and joy. Yo, yo, yo. This is the Bert Locker living that bling life on Christmas Eve.
