Well, here I am. You mean, we get to be best friends for real? For real. Forever and ever?
Ted
1.2s
Wait a second.
Ted
5.4s
These were John Lennon's glasses. They're worth, like, a million dollars. That's me and Tom Skerritt.
Ted
2.2s
I know, sir, I'm sorry. It wasn't my fault.
Ted
2s
All right, easy. Come on, Ted.
Ted
1.3s
You asshole!
Ted
1.5s
Welcome back, Ted.
Ted
21.8s
Well, I am a former celebrity in a minimum wage job. This is how the cast of Diff'rent Strokes feels. All day, every day. Just awful. They must feel awful. The live ones must feel awful. Come on. It's not that bad, okay? I got a shitty job, and I assure you, lam quite content. Excuse me. I'm sorry to bother you but my son and I couldn't help but admire your teddy bear.
Ted
7.3s
Just like in the movie. Yes. Get over here right now. Fuck, I can%! I'm with Lori here. I'm already on probation.
Ted
3.3s
Yeah, first night in my beautiful new apartment.
Ted
5.9s
Uh... I'm not sure, it's... (DIAL TONE) Hello? Hello, John?
Ted
3s
Don't ever lose her again.
Ted
5.4s
Well, as it turned out, John picked the perfect night to make a wish.
Ted
2.8s
Okay, here's a test to see how much you actually care about me.
