Found 946 results

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He wore the brown pants.

Deadpool

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Then who placed the call?

Deadpool

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Because she knows you. Jeremy, I belong to a group of guys who take a dime to beat a fella down. And little Meghan, she's not made of money, but lucky for her... I got a soft spot.

Deadpool

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Then whose kitty litter did I just shit in?

Deadpool

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(GROANS)

Deadpool

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And yeah, technically, this is a murder. But some of the best love stories start with a murder. And that's exactly what this is, a love story. And to tell it right... I gotta take you back to long before I squeezed this ass into red spandex.

Deadpool

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Motherfucker!

Deadpool

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Fine! I only have 12 bullets... so you're gonna have to share! Let's count them down.

Deadpool

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I'm here for you. On. (CHUCKLES) Okay, wow, dodged a big-time bullet onthatone. Not out of the woods yet. (GROANS)

Deadpool

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(GRUNTS) (GUN CLICKING)

Deadpool

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In case the other fell off.

Deadpool

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Anyhoo, tell me something... what situation isn't improved by pizza? Do you happen to know a Meghan Orflosky? Getting that right? Orflosky? Orlovsky? Yeah? Good.

Deadpool

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Really? Rolling up the sleeves?

Deadpool

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But I'm a... A stalker.

Deadpool

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(GROANING)

Deadpool

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Pineapple and olive?

Deadpool

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You need to seriously ease up on the bedazzling. They're jeans, not a chandelier. P.S. I'm keeping your wallet. You did kinda give it to me. Okay, just look, man, can I have my Sam's card... I will shoot your fucking cat!

Deadpool

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I don't really know what that means. I don't have a cat.

Deadpool