Like, a Yakov-Smirnoff- opening-for-the Spin-Doctors- at-the- lowa-State-Fair shit-show.
Deadpool
3.7s
El Cancer. Oh. I could have guessed that.
Deadpool
2.2s
(WADE CHUCKLES)
Deadpool
1.2s
I love you.
Deadpool
1.3s
Wade.
Deadpool
10.1s
I get why you're so pissy... but your mood's never gonna brighten till you find this woman... and tell her how you feel. What do I keep telling you, Mrs. Magoo? She wouldn't have me.
Deadpool
5.9s
Chechnya. Isn't that where you go to get cancer? You got China and Central Mexico.
Deadpool
3.8s
Not the ghost of Christmas me. Well, I wanna remember us.
Deadpool
4.7s
And under no circumstances will I take you to that show.
Deadpool
2.3s
Besides, I just realized something.
Deadpool
3.2s
No one is boom-boxing shit. Okay?
Deadpool
1.9s
Right. And when he heals?
Deadpool
1.6s
(MUSIC PLAYING)
Deadpool
8.4s
If you could see me, you'd understand. Looks aren't everything. Looks are everything. You ever heard David Beckham speak? It's like he mouth-sexed a can of helium.
Deadpool
7.4s
So, you're just gonna lie there and whimper? No, I'm gonna wait till this arm plows through puberty... and then I'm gonna come up with a whole new Christmas Day plan.
Deadpool
5.7s
You think Ryan Reynolds got this far on his superior acting method? Love is blind, Wade. No.
Deadpool
6.6s
I raided my stash of wisdom tooth Percocet... and I am orbiting fucking Saturn right now.
Deadpool
6.4s
Am I crazy, or is your hand really small? About the size of a KFC spork.
