Uh, all of our holdings are tied up in the railroads. Yeah, Reading Railroad, 5&0 Railroad, Pennsylvania Railroad. We're working on Short Line. Urn, I own Atlantic Avenue and Marvin Gardens. And I own four houses on Baltic Ave. I was thinking about just tearing them down and building a hotel. I won second prize in a beauty contest. That's $50 right there. Are you guys just saying Monopoly stuff?
Ted 2
18.3s
Tell you what, I'm gonna go drive around the blook, and I'll be back with $200. I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. My niece recently passed her bar exam and I've hired her on as a junior associate here at the firm. I could assign her to your case, pro bono. And then you would get a hungry, young attorney and I would get a more experienced lawyer in return.
Ted 2
2.8s
Your adoption request may have raised some red flags.
Ted 2
2.7s
What? In the urinals, sir.
Ted 2
1.7s
I'm afraid I have bad news.
Ted 2
1.5s
(SIGHS)
Ted 2
4.8s
Not according to the government. I'm sorry. But that is so fucked up!
Ted 2
2.6s
I'm not a person?
Ted 2
1.7s
Wait, what?
Ted 2
24.5s
I mean, maybe more like a hammer or an orange, but yeah. What the hell do they know? It's just a word. They can't change your whole life just by calling you property! Bullshit! You better ask my ancestors. One minute, you in Africa, washing your clothes in the river, titties out. You good. Then all of a sudden, you somewhere across the world, fucking Thomas Jefferson. Wow! You make history come alive. Why the hell is this just coming up now?
Ted 2
1.6s
I'm gonna try.
Ted 2
1.5s
It's been some time, hasn't it?
Ted 2
2.4s
Come on. (SIGHS)
Ted 2
2.2s
You know what, Teddy? Let's get out of here.
Ted 2
5.2s
(STAMMERS) Oh. I don't mean this. I meant, like, a regular drink. I have a boyfriend.
Ted 2
14.9s
Child World toy store. I'm sorry, I couldn't hear that. Could you repeat that, please? Child World toy store. You fucking heard me. There's no need for hostility, Mr. Bennett. Why? Nobody here likes you! I saw you eating lunch alone! You're a loser! Your Honor? Mr. Bennett. I hope your kids get bird flu! Mr. Bennett! I'm sorry.