[VANESSA MOANS] I'm gonna shower and get out of this suit. Don't you want your surprise? Do I look like a patient burn victim?
Deadpool 2
14.2s
I have a mission now. The first thing I wanna do when I get out of here... burn the headmaster alive... and then take a selfie with his smoldering corpse. Aw. That's, like, my favorite part of the Bible.
Deadpool 2
3.9s
I'll keep it forever. [CHUCKLES] Thank you, baby.
Deadpool 2
18s
I'll also be the first to admit that that plan was written in crayon. Looks like Russell found a new friend. Jelly. Turns out Domino's a bit of a badass, and maybe, possibly mildly lucky. But Cable? Ugh. That guy's in a mood. [CHUCKLES] A mood that is about to get significantly worse.
Deadpool 2
4.3s
Black Evan, I don't know. All I remember is he was African-American.
Deadpool 2
1.2s
Who?
Deadpool 2
3.6s
REPORTER: ...several police cars were destroyed and the X-Men were called in to restore order.
Deadpool 2
36.4s
Sorry I'm late. There was a bunch of handicapable children stuck in a tree... and I had to, uh... Uh-uh. You're right. I was fighting a caped badass. But then we discovered his mom is named Martha, too. No.You got me. I was rounding up all the gluten in the world and launching it into space... where it can't not hurt us ever again. Try again. Diarrhea? We can't be sure until I get this suit off... but, uh, all signs point to yes. Traffic? Hmm? Kiss me like you miss me, Red. Well, come here.
Deadpool 2
6.1s
May. Connor, if it's a boy. May, if it's a girl.
Deadpool 2
4.1s
No. Get down. What? [GUN FIRES]
Deadpool 2
6.7s
WADE: Rock... meet bottom.
Deadpool 2
1.9s
Maybe I can get you out of here.
Deadpool 2
1.9s
[TAKE ON MEPLAYING]
Deadpool 2
25.9s
Oh... That's just the most beautiful thing that I've... I don't know what this is. My IUD. A bomb? No, dick for brains. My birth control device. What, you mean that your... Baby factory's open for business. Oh, my God! [BOX CLATTERS] [VANESSA LAUGHS] Oh, my God! I want a boy! Or a little girl! Definitely one or the other! Oh! And I want our kid to have only one name.
Deadpool 2
5.6s
In the sky. You're my Tom Cruise! DEADPOOL: And you're my Kristen Dunst! Kristen? Kirsten?
Deadpool 2
1.5s
[BREATHING HEAVILY] [ALARM BLARING]
Deadpool 2
9.8s
I could get used to this X-Man shit. NEGASONIC TEENAGE WARHEAD: Trainee! DEADPOOL: Trainee! OFFICER: Get a power restraint on him. Now! DEADPOOL: Calm down, squirt. It's over. We got ya.
Deadpool 2
12.8s
[RUSSELL EXHALES] RUSSELL: I know it's in there, I just need to get it out. Oh, Jesus Christ. I can hear you rummaging around in there. Do they make Purell for your ears? [SIREN WAILING]
