Hello? Johnny, Johnny, it's me. You got to help me. Ted, where are you? Dude, we've been looking everywhere for you. I'm at Comic Con, but, John, it's Donny! He's here! He's after me. You got to get over here. What the fuck? Did you just say "Donny"? John, what's going on? Yes, it's him! He's...
Ted 2
1.2s
What the hell?
Ted 2
1.4s
Good.
Ted 2
1.3s
Jusflce.
Ted 2
1.2s
Sir?
Ted 2
1.5s
How far away does he live?
Ted 2
10s
Well, I guess it's all right. Those are the rejected sickle-cell samples. Ah, you hear that, Johnny? You're covered in rejected black-guy sperm. You look like a Kardashian. Fuck!
Ted 2
1.2s
Uh...
Ted 2
16.5s
All right, I got Dred Scott v. Sandford, Plessy v. Ferguson and Brown v. the Board of Education. I got Kramer vs. Kramer, Alien vs. Predator, and Freddy vs. Jason. I got, uh, Ernest Goes to Camp, Ernest Goes to Jail and The Importance of Being Earnest, which was very disappointing.
Ted 2
19.5s
Oh, my God, Teddy! (STUTTERS) What? What's wrong? Look at this. (SOBBING) "Dear Ted, "the state of Massachusetts regrets to inform you "that due to an oversight regarding your legal status "your marriage to Tami-Lynn McCafferty is unrecognized by the state "and, therefore, invalid and hereby annulled."
Ted 2
1.7s
He needs help.
Ted 2
3.1s
Teddy, can they do this to us? Let me see that.
Ted 2
2.9s
Bottom line is, insemination is not possible.
Ted 2
1.2s
What?
Ted 2
20.5s
(SINGING) What did you think I would do at this moment When you're standing before me With tears in your eyes That answer your question? Objection. Your Honor? (SINGSONGY) Overruled! A-ha! What it is, man! Dynomite.
Ted 2
10s
And while I'm sympathetic to your cause, I'm sorry to say I won't be taking your case. What? Why? Why not? Well, it comes down to this.
