Yeah, as you can see you've been a part of our family for quite some time.
Ted
3.5s
I guess I wasn't really prepared for a follow-up question.
Ted
1.4s
Sounds good to me.
Ted
2.6s
I think we're very far apart on this.
Ted
2.1s
Stay here. Just stay there! No, John!
Ted
5.8s
John longed with all his heart for that one, true friend that he could call his own.
Ted
1.5s
(YELLING INDISTINCTLY)
Ted
11.6s
TED: Play Chopsticks, you jazzy slut. Teddy! (LAUGHS) How are you? How are you doing, you fuzzy little asshole? Well, I'm not a hot, half-Muslim chick who sold 37 million records, but I'm hanging in there.
Ted
1.3s
RECORDED TOY VOICE: I love you!
Ted
6s
And he knew that if he ever found that friend, he would never let him go.
Ted
2.2s
Uh-oh. Get him!
Ted
12.8s
It was Christmas Eve, and all the children were in high spirits. That special time of year when Boston children gather together and beat up the Jewish kids. Hey, Greenbaum!
Ted
10.4s
I'm sorry, Mr. Bennett, I didn't mean to scare anybody. I just wanted John and I to be friends. Yeah, Dad, I made a wish last night that Teddy was alive and my wish came true.
Ted
8.5s
(SIGHS) Look, John loves you very much, more than anything in the world, and he's falling to fucking pieces without you.
Ted
2.6s
Rape! (YELLING)
Ted
1.5s
(ENGINE REVVING)
Ted
1.2s
Who's that over there?
Ted
22.5s
Plus, a hooker took a shit in our apartment. Oh, God! Ah, what? Oh, this is so gross! Don't tell me! I don't want to hear about it! Did you get it? No, I didn't get it! Tell me when you get it! Oh, my God, I got some on my thumb! No! You can never cook with that hand again! Oh, my God! You have to learn to cook left-handed. This is the most disgusting thing ever! Don't! Get it away from me! Look, that was a tough night for all of us.
