Oh, no, I didn't get excited till I saw the Kullen. Screw, please. Here? Now? Just kidding. I know it's been decades. You'd be surprised.
Deadpool
6.3s
Please. Anything's an improvement over the Hurdal. I'd have taken an Hemnes or a Trysil over the Hurdal.
Deadpool
8.9s
How's that Kullen coming along? IKEA doesn't assemble itself, you know. You're telling me. I don't mind the Kullen. It's an improvement on the Hurdal.
Deadpool
6.6s
Sit on a stick. Bacfln? Yeah. Bactin should do it.
Deadpool
9.4s
Catching him was my only chance to be hot again, get my super sexy ex back... and prevent this shit from happening to someone else. So,yeah, today was about as much fun as a sandpaper dildo.
Deadpool
8.2s
And I quote, "Looking for roommate, "blind to life's imperfections. "Must be good with hands." Or would you rather I build the IKEA, and you pay rent? Why such a douche this morning?
Deadpool
5.8s
Upside of being blind: I've never seen you in Crocs. You mean my big, rubber masturbating shoes? AL: Yes, I know.
Deadpool
5.3s
Let's recap. The cock thistle that turned me into this freak... slipped through my arms today...
Deadpool
3.3s
I wish I never heard of Craigslist.
Deadpool
2.5s
(GROANS) Ta... Da.
Deadpool
1.2s
(GROANS)
Deadpool
1.4s
Go on then.
Deadpool
1.7s
(MUMBLING CONTINUES)
Deadpool
1.2s
(WHIMPERS)
Deadpool
3.4s
(MUMBLING) Put her down over here.
Deadpool
11.9s
Wow. You're a talker too. You and Wade. I've been trying to tell you assholes, you've got the wrong girl. My old boyfriend, he's dead. See, I thought that too. But he keeps on coming back.