Hello, Master Bruce. Alfred, there's something wrong with the Batcomputer. Watch this. 'Puter. Nothing. 'Puter. Do you see what I'm saying? There's nothing wrong with it, sir. I have just taken away your computer privileges. The parental lock? You can't do that. Oh, I can. I've been reading Setting Limits for Your Out-of-Control Child. You know what? Doesn't matter, 'cause I have a double-secret super password that unlocks the parental lock. You mean, "Alfred da Butt-ler," with two T's?
The Lego Batman Movie
10.3s
Sir, it's time for you to stop this unhealthy behavior. No, it's not. You need to take responsibility for your life. Not right now, I don't. And it starts by raising your son.
The Lego Batman Movie
7.2s
I'm sorry. I literally have no idea what you're talking about. The young orphan you adopted at the gala. Remember?
The Lego Batman Movie
5.2s
He's been living here for the past week. Hello, table! Boom!
The Lego Batman Movie
1.4s
'Puter, do you hear me?
The Lego Batman Movie
2.2s
You said that out loud.
The Lego Batman Movie
3.2s
Wow! Stairs. Whee!
The Lego Batman Movie
1.5s
Smoke bomb!
The Lego Batman Movie
2m35s
Batman! Whoa! You're darn right, "Whoa." Wait, does Batman live in Bruce Wayne's basement? No. Bruce Wayne lives in Batman's attic. - We can have sleepovers every night! - No, we can't. - Wow! Look, it's the Bat-Sub! - Wait, don't touch that! Over there, it's the Bat-Space shuttle. Please, keep your hands off that. - Look, it's the Bat-Zeppelin! - Don't touch that either! - It's the Bat-Train! - No! - It's the Bat-Kayak. - No! - It's the Bat-Dune buggy. - No! It's the Bat shark repellent? Uh, actually, you can touch that. It's completely useless. Whoa! Thanks, Batman! Please, stand over there. And don't touch, look at, or do anything for the remaining moments you have in my presence. Okay, cool. - Computer. - Go ahead. How do I put the Joker in the Phantom Zone? Joker can only be put in the Phantom Zone using the Phantom Zone Projector. Current location, Superman's Fortress of Solitude inside the Atomic Cauldron. However, only a person that isn't shredded, ripped, or extremely swoll can enter the cauldron. Ugh, I'm way too buff. You also have beautiful abs, sir. That's my cross to bear. Additionally, once inside the cauldron, multiple Kryptonian defense systems engage, including the Acid Moat, Ring of Napalm, and the Jaws of Death. Chance of total mission failure is 110%. Those are not great odds. Wait a minute. - Hey, kid. - Yes, sir? - You're super nimble, right? - I sure am! - And small? - Very. - And quiet? - When I desire to be. And 110% expendable? I don't know what that means, but okay. Great. Follow me. We are gonna steal the Phantom Zone Projector from Superman. - Steal? - Yeah. We have to right a wrong. And, sometimes, in order to right a wrong, you have to do a wrong-right. Gandhi said that. Are we sure Gandhi said that? - I'm paraphrasing. - Cool! Preparing Fortress of Solitude infiltration gear. Wow! Look at all these! Do I get a costume for the mission, too? I got a feeling that you'll just look like a kid on Halloween. Don't you think? Don't touch that. Whoo-hoo! - El Mariachi. - I like that one! - That one is culturally insensitive. - Night Terror. - That one! - No way. - This one? - Death Merchant. - No. - I'm okay. - This one. - Fire Starter. - This one. - Clawed Reigns. - Excali-Bat. - This one? - Silent but Deadly. - Nope. Bat-ryshnikov. How do we feel about this one? Dress-up parties are for grown-ups only. Wait. What's that one there? That one was for the assignment called The Jamaican Caper. The locals called me Reggae Man. I love it! Ah! Feels like I was poured into this. My only trouble is, these pants are just a little tight. I don't know if I could throw a kick or jump in them. I got an idea. Rip! That's better! Now I'm free, now I'm moving. Come on, Batman. Let's get grooving!
The Lego Batman Movie
49.8s
Tree pose. Hey, Batman! Barbara! What are you doing? Nothing. I have a very full life. No, I mean, what are you doing here? Surveillance. On the Joker. Batman, we both know the Joker's up to something. Well, then we can't just let him run around loose in a prison. He's not loose. He has to go someplace outside the law. - Outside the law? - Yeah. Somewhere like, uh... Hi, there. I'm here from Phantom's Own Laundry. Here to take that bad stuff off your hands. Wait, that's it! The Phantom Zone. The Phantom Zone? No way! That is super illegal and way outside our jurisdiction. So, why don't you and I work together inside the law, to figure out what he's up to? Batman works alone. That's my motto. Copyright Batman.
The Lego Batman Movie
8s
I know that she said I said that out loud, but there's no way I did. She has no idea what's going on in my super-mind. Super-mind?
The Lego Batman Movie
5.2s
Computer, how do I put the Joker in the Phantom Zone? Quickest route, no freeways.
The Lego Batman Movie
8.4s
Doesn't he deserve a chance for someone to take him under their wing, as I took you under mine?
The Lego Batman Movie
3.5s
- Whoo! - Yeah! - Whoo! - Yeah! Yes, yes, yes!
The Lego Batman Movie
1.7s
Faster, Dad! Faster!
The Lego Batman Movie
18.8s
- Who's the manliest man? - Ugh! Batman! - With the buns of steel? - Batman! 'Puter. - Who could choke-hold a bear? - Batman! - Who never skips leg day? - Batman! Who always pays their taxes? Not Batman How is he beating all of you again?
The Lego Batman Movie
43.5s
Well, I don't wanna scare any small children who may be listening, but it's a little-known fact that Gotham City is built on a bunch of flimsy plates stuck together. There's literally nothing beneath us, except an infinite abyss that smells like dirty underwear. If Joker's bomb were to go off, these plates would break apart, plunging every Gotham citizen into the eternal abyss forever. And you wouldn't want that, now would you? Now get me the mayor! Joker out! Madam Mayor, I cannot ask you to do this! - Jim, did you find Batman? - No, ma'am. Then we have no choice. The Joker has the upper hand. We have to surrender Gotham City. Oh, no. I'm sorry!
The Lego Batman Movie
12.7s
What the... I get the last laugh, I get the final grin Throw you into the asylum With Harley Quinn Turn Two-Face To black-and-blue face I 100% am not Bruce Wayne!