- Yes, I pee and poo. - So you have a butthole? I've got a butthole, and it's working overtime. You are awesome.
The Interview
6.2s
Desperately. Because I could never get it... from my father when I was a kid.
The Interview
9.3s
- Let's get the fuck out of here. - Wait! The puppy. - What happened to your hand? - Someone bit my fucking fingers off. - That's just like Frodo! - Whoa! Shit!
The Interview
1.8s
Oh, my God!
The Interview
26.5s
That way. It's an old mining tunnel. - Holy shit, where does that go? - West. Away from Pyongyang. Keep moving until you reach the coast. I wish you both luck. You sound like you're not coming with us. - I have to go to Pyongyang. - Right back into the snake pit! I can't leave North Korea. I just helped plunge it into chaos! So did we. I'm okay with leaving. I have to ensure that the power does not transfer to the wrong hands. I can't deny that we have chemistry.
The Interview
9.5s
You know, this is so weird. You are, like, the coolest guy. But a lot of people say... that you're batshit crazy.
The Interview
1.4s
Go!
The Interview
1.3s
Me too.
The Interview
1.4s
Nice.
The Interview
52.3s
Fine. - Are you serious right now? - Yeah. - Do you promise you'll do this? - If you promise you'll never leave. - If you promise, I promise. - Same time. - One, two, three. Promise. - Promise. - Okay. - Okay. That's all we had to say. - Don't put me through that. - Fine. Okay. I hate it when we fight. No, this is not a joke, okay? - I think you're being condescending. - Look, look, look. One sec. Shut up, I'm on the phone, okay? Dude. The fuck, man?! That was John Kerry's office. Forget that oak tree-looking fuck. This tops it. The Times printed it about North Korea. Read the bottom. After all the death-camp shit. "Although Kim Jong-un rallies his people... with cries for the destruction of the United States of America... he is known to be an avid consumer of American entertainment. His favorite shows are The Big Bang Theory..." And...?
The Interview
4.1s
Is there anything that you would like to say to America?
The Interview
37.5s
Dude, seriously, what is up with you? Know how I'm good at picking up energies? You're shooting off a slightly cunty vibe right now. What's going on? We have millions of viewers every night and what do we do? We just shovel shit into their faces. We could be doing something positive. We could be having on authors, activists, politicians. That's what people want. "Give us some shit. Mangia. We're the people, give us the shit. Mangia, mangia." I wanted to cover actual news... not Nicki Minaj's vagina flopping out at the Grammys. - You don't like brown sugar? - Nothing to do with that. I can't keep doing this, okay? We have to change!
The Interview
24.3s
Yeah, like, what's that? Come on, man, what's happening? - Hey, yeah. What's happening? - How's it going, dude? We haven't seen each other since graduation. Right? Yeah. Probably. And, wait, am I wrong? You're a junior producer on 60 Minutes, right? - I'm now a senior producer. Yeah. - No way, man. That's awesome. Look at us. Both producing news for television. Yeah.
The Interview
2.7s
I'm glad to meet you. Okay.
The Interview
16.5s
They call me incompetent. That's what they said about me when I scored this interview! - No way! - They said, "Dave Skylark is stupid... and incompetent." You're handsome, competent, suave. How dare they? I pretend like their insults don't get to me.
The Interview
32s
This is great! This is what you were talking about! I interview this guy. Are you joking? He's the most reclusive leader on the planet. He lives in North Korea. We can't go there. Dave Skylark... gets in anywhere. Do you remember that club? Three-month waiting list. First night. I don't think it's quite the same thing. - There were a lot of Asian girls there. - It's impossible, Dave. Here's what we'll do. We're gonna do that interview. Everyone is gonna take you super-duper seriously.
The Interview
4.8s
He said that my brothers and I were all too feminine.