Found 796 results
32.4s
That's appropriate. - Hey, Mitch. - Jamie, we need to talk. Are you going to stay for dinner? No, I can't stay for dinner, but I would love to... Look, I got to tell you something. I can't talk right now, Mitch. It's been so crazy here. The twins are a half-hour past their bedtime. - What are you doing? - What are you, some kind of animal? And Cara has to start her homework. I have an emergency phone call in four minutes. You know that building? The 11-story building? I have to remove three stories somehow. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. It's so ridiculous. It makes no sense at all. I'm not Mitch.
The Change-Up
22.7s
Okay, pumpkin, this is... Mitch, no. Don't call me pumpkin, okay? And you promised me that you would clean out... Can you shut this off? - It smells like cabbage now! - Jamie, Jamie, Jamie, sit down. One second. Just humor me, all right? I want you to ask me one thing... I don't want to play your games. ...that only Dave would be able to answer. Just one question. Please, I'm begging you. Good idea.
The Change-Up
13.8s
What happened was, we pissed in a magic fountain... ...and the next day it disappeared. They moved the fountain, so now we're looking for it. And when they find it, we're going to switch back. We had to pee because we were drinking. We were drinking. That sounds like a plan. Can you start the bath for the twins?
The Change-Up
1m9s
Hey. Hey, how did it go? - You shut up! - What happened? We'll get into Mr. Thumb's wild ride in a minute. First, you're going to tell me, how did the deal go? Awesome. The deal went awesome. Good. So, it's closed? Yeah, fucking closed. Basically closed. A little bit of a hiccup, but... What do you mean, a hiccup? A little bit of a hiccup. Your fucking boss is an anti-Semite. Did you know that? Oh, my God! What did you do? I was playing it nice and cool, just like we talked about, and then these goddamn squids, these Japs, these fucking Kamikaze pilots are coming at me, riddling me with fucking questions. I had to do a little improv, and they got very emotional. Will you just tell me how it ended? - You're going to court. - No! Fuck! Oh, my God! Your boss was a little pissed off. I told him it was part of my secret master plan. No, you didn't! We'll work on one of those. You tell me how my shit went. - Your shit? - How'd my stuff go? Mitch, what the hell is wrong with you? It was a porno movie! It's a lorno, a light porn. The dick stays in the pants, right? They didn't pull it out, did they? But my thumb went in three girls' assholes. Get the sand out of your vagina. Did you finish the day? I finished the day, Mitchell. What are you doing? - I finished the day. - Good. You're living the dream. You're living the fucking dream! Your job sucks, too. This isn't going to work. This is not going to work. That's way too much.
The Change-Up