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7.9s

Drop the mic, baby! Drop the mic, baby! - That's what I'm talking about! - Peace out, niggas! I see you, boy. Nasty!

Dirty Grandpa

13.7s

He says he's very sorry, but he can't marry you. Uncle Ruben, can you turn that thing up a little? It doesn't get any louder. Where'd you get that thing, SkyMall?

Dirty Grandpa

21.3s

- You ready to hit the road? - I'm really sorry, Grandpa. I didn't think you'd be doing that. Ah, so you caught me taking a number three. - Big deal, right? - Number three? Have a drink. Uh... No. I'm driving, so... I just got to finish up my exercises, and then we'll hop on 16 to 95.

Dirty Grandpa

27.5s

Okay, Daytona Beach, are you ready to Flex Off? Three! Two! One! Flex! Having trouble getting that coat off, Fat Goose? Uh... Look at this guy! He's like Mother Teresa's vagina! Old and tight! Hey, look, it's Cirque du So Gay! What now?

Dirty Grandpa

22.3s

Give me that! What is this? Hey! Hey, hey, hey... Leave my illegitimate black son alone. We were just asking him to dance. - Well, he don't wanna dance. - Well, maybe you wanna dance instead. - I don't wanna dance... - Colonel Sanders! It's all right. It's all right. Let's not dirty this place up. It's a shrine. Sinatra sang here. Parking lot?

Dirty Grandpa

37.9s

♪ And everything is all right ♪ I got a beep from Kim And she can fuck all night ♪ Called up the homies and I'm asking y'all ♪ Which park are y'all playing basketball? ♪ Get me on the court and I'm trouble ♪ Last week fucked around And got a triple double Can I say it? Can I say it? No! No, no. - Say it! - Say that shit! ♪ Freaking niggas every way like MJ ♪ I can't believe today was a good day? I'm totally gonna fuck him tonight. Can I watch? 'Cause I kind of want to fuck him too now.

Dirty Grandpa

6s

Uncle Ruben, can you please tell Meredith that Jason is really sorry, but that he can't marry her?

Dirty Grandpa

5.9s

Can you please go tell Meredith that my cousin Jason is very sorry, but they cannot get married?

Dirty Grandpa

7.1s

Slow down! Oh, my God! What are you doing? Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down, dude!

Dirty Grandpa

1.6s

But that he's sorry that he can't.

Dirty Grandpa

1.7s

Come...

Dirty Grandpa

8.8s

Guess it's never too late to start over. Yeah, nice to have a second chance. Maybe it won't take me so long to get the father thing right this time.

Dirty Grandpa

3.4s

Right? I'll go get his car seat.

Dirty Grandpa

3.9s

Yeah, you should. She seems real nice.

Dirty Grandpa

59.7s

- Break it up, lesbians! Let's go. - Get down on the ground! We're doing this because you're lesbians! Get down on the ground! According to lnterstate Statute 17.37, arrests made on the lnterstate Highway System must be executed by state police, not your local law enforcement from your adjacent municipalities. You seem, like, really familiar with the penal code. You seem real cocksure about the juris-dick-tion you're in. Real cocksure! Someone drew dicks all over your face, you idiot! Well, look at that! You got dicks on your face. That middle one's mine. Look it, this one right here. - I traced it. - I thought I recognized that! Enough catching up. Let my friends go. They've literally done nothing wrong. Pam, we've got obstruction of justice here. - We got reckless endangerment. - The bus is full of drugs, I get it. Ooh, speaking of which, I've got to get out of here. I got three keys of "Frisbees" showing up to the store today, so... - I should go, question mark? - Why don't you take my squad car. That's a good idea. Give him your keys. - You mean these keys? - There they are.

Dirty Grandpa

2.4s

...might actually be the best place for me.

Dirty Grandpa

9.6s

I just broke up with my fiancée, lost my job. And I think I'm wanted by the police, so... A year at sea...

Dirty Grandpa

14.5s

Damn it, Grandpa. Just tell him! Uh... I was a Green Beret in Special Forces. I taught insurgents behind enemy lines. Mechanic was just my cover. Good! We're all made up! There they are! That's them! Let's go, go, go!

Dirty Grandpa

Found 289 results

Drop the mic, baby! Drop the mic, baby! - That's what I'm talking about! - Peace out, niggas! I see you, boy. Nasty!

He says he's very sorry, but he can't marry you. Uncle Ruben, can you turn that thing up a little? It doesn't get any louder. Where'd you get that thing, SkyMall?

- You ready to hit the road? - I'm really sorry, Grandpa. I didn't think you'd be doing that. Ah, so you caught me taking a number three. - Big deal, right? - Number three? Have a drink. Uh... No. I'm driving, so... I just got to finish up my exercises, and then we'll hop on 16 to 95.

Okay, Daytona Beach, are you ready to Flex Off? Three! Two! One! Flex! Having trouble getting that coat off, Fat Goose? Uh... Look at this guy! He's like Mother Teresa's vagina! Old and tight! Hey, look, it's Cirque du So Gay! What now?

Uncle Ruben, can you please tell Meredith that Jason is really sorry, but that he can't marry her?

Can you please go tell Meredith that my cousin Jason is very sorry, but they cannot get married?

Slow down! Oh, my God! What are you doing? Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down, dude!

But that he's sorry that he can't.

Come...

Guess it's never too late to start over. Yeah, nice to have a second chance. Maybe it won't take me so long to get the father thing right this time.

Right? I'll go get his car seat.

Yeah, you should. She seems real nice.

...might actually be the best place for me.

I just broke up with my fiancée, lost my job. And I think I'm wanted by the police, so... A year at sea...

Damn it, Grandpa. Just tell him! Uh... I was a Green Beret in Special Forces. I taught insurgents behind enemy lines. Mechanic was just my cover. Good! We're all made up! There they are! That's them! Let's go, go, go!