Don't do this. I think I'm going to have to fight them all, so you're going to have to take the first punch. - What? - Okay! He's up first. Whatever. You like that shit, white boy? Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you? What? You want next, bitch? Hey, I thought I had next.
Dirty Grandpa
12.6s
Oh, well, better late than never. Yeah! Fuck them up, ALF! Motherfucker! Stinky? What the fuck are you doing here, Dick?
Dirty Grandpa
9.3s
What is it? Oh, it's, uh... Just another wedding present. I hope it's that new big dipping spoon from Williams-Sonoma.
Dirty Grandpa
3.3s
- Whoa! Got ourselves a bogey. - All right, let's do this!
Dirty Grandpa
12.5s
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Go! Go! Chug!
Dirty Grandpa
2.6s
Holy fucking shit!
Dirty Grandpa
1m18s
Hey. ♪ For all those times you stood by me ♪ For all the truth that you made me see ♪ For all the joy you brought to my life ♪ For all the wrong that you made right ♪ For every dream you made come true ♪ For all the love I found in you ♪ I'll be forever thankful, baby ♪ You're the one who held me up ♪ And never let me fall Yeah, yeah ♪ You're the one who saw me through ♪ Through it all ♪ You were my strength when I was weak ♪ You were my voice when I couldn't speak ♪ You were my eyes when I couldn't see ♪ You saw the best there was in me ♪ Lifted me up when I couldn't reach ♪ You gave me faith 'cause you believed ♪ I'm everything I am - Damn! - ♪ Because you loved me?
Dirty Grandpa
2.9s
Sting? You're stung!
Dirty Grandpa
10s
Whoo! Yeah! Do it again! We can change in Cody's room. I picked his pocket earlier. Nothing to see here, guys. Cops are gonna come pretty quick.
Dirty Grandpa
7.5s
You can't get into it anyway because you don't know my code. Looks like your grandpa remembered your birthday! - What? Give me that! - We're going to fucking Daytona.
Dirty Grandpa
13.7s
He says he's very sorry, but he can't marry you. Uncle Ruben, can you turn that thing up a little? It doesn't get any louder. Where'd you get that thing, SkyMall?
Dirty Grandpa
12.5s
So... are you getting married next weekend? I was. I was getting married, but then I met you, and now I don't... Oh, my God! No. Don't pull that shit.
Dirty Grandpa
2.1s
I just smoked crack!
Dirty Grandpa
2.3s
- Blood. - Semen it is.
Dirty Grandpa
2.2s
And you're my uncle.
Dirty Grandpa
2s
Hey, Griz...
Dirty Grandpa
1m20s
All right, our team won! Let's celebrate by buying local drugs from a reputable, local drug dealer. Hey, what are you doing here? I'm selling drugs, man. I'm trying to put my kid through preschool. How honest is that! Touching my face a lot, bro. Touching my face a whole lot, man. Why don't you take some of this. This'Il mellow you out. - What is it? - E-cig, bro. "E" is for "Weed"! Sure, why not? Yeah, ooh, that's a big... That's a big one. Oh! Whoo! Just be glad you didn't smoke this, man. This is crack! - What? - Oh, yeah! This one... Oh, wait a minute... Maybe that one's crack and this one's weed. Hang on. What'd you do now, Pam? Fuck. Hold on. Which one's crack? Okay. I got this. Don't freak out. Sorry to worry you, man. You're not gonna believe this. - They're both crack. - What? And you have taken an amount that will probably kill you in about 30 minutes. - I just smoked crack? - Yeah. But just, like, a lot. I just smoked crack.