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41.5s

This ball club is the heart of this institution. You win, it beats. You lose, it breaks. You're not boxing out, Big Papa. You're my Windex man. I want you shining glass. We gotta D up out there. Darius. I want you all over that ball like a fat kid on a cupcake. What are you looking at? Your mom said you left your legs at home. For God's sake! I'd do anything for you guys... which is why I'm throwing you a little soiree tomorrow night... but not without a W tonight. You want to know why? Nobody wants to celebrate a loss, guys. Hey, man, you gonna invite those freak honeys from Mt. Holyoke? I already did. They said they'd try to make it if they weren't humping the Matadors. - The Matadors? - What?

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

17.9s

"Depression: Is Prozac really the answer?" "Famine-- Crisis in Rwanda." "Tracking Tuition: Where does our money really go?" Each article well-written and researched by our own Gwen Pearson... and each article skipped over by the majority of the student body. I don't care. I won't pander to them.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

1.9s

Mail it in!

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

7.8s

It does not look good. That's the end of the first half... and the Chickadees will need a miracle to come back and score.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

40.8s

Let's go kick some Matador tail-- How bad do you wanna be... a Delta? Would you walk on broken glass? Let the shards tear into your Achilles tendon... causing acute achondroplasia... which could lead to non-congenital dwarfism as you got older?

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.9s

Dad, what are you doing here?

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

11.3s

Is it true that this is your seventh year at Coolidge? Carry the two-- Yes, that's correct. So what's your boyfriend's name? Does he go to school here? - Does he appreciate you? - That's none of your business. You know what? You're right.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

13.3s

Excuse me. Where can I find Van Wilder? In the Guiness Book of World-fucking-Records, man... under "Raddest fucking dude alive"! Okay. Thanks. In any one of these three rooms, Gramps.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

17s

Ease up on the medical terms. Just keep it simple and terrifying. Gordon, there are very few things more terrifying than non-congenital dwarfism. Hey, Richard. Ready to study? Gwenny, I said 9:30. It's 9:20. I'm in the middle of an 80-year tradition here.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.5s

Come on. We got a ball game to win.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

3s

Who's my alabaster princess?

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

7.1s

What is that intoxicating scent you're wearing, Doris? I have cats. Meow!

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

21.2s

"Lite Beer vs. Dark-- The Showdown" by Darius Grayson. - Is that the same-- - Pulitzer-prize winning Darius Grayson. He was an alumnus of our journalism staff. He wrote his best stuff in detox. Still does, I'm told. I have got a very challenging assignment for you. A story that nobody's been able to get. - About what? - No, no. It's about whom.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

15.2s

Oh, yeah. That's the shit. Guess what. I'm feeling a little cold sore coming on. Maybe we shouldn't do this for three to six weeks. Shut up, bitch, and give me some sugar.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

3.4s

You can either mail this in or drop it off. Go, baby, go!

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

4.1s

I need more time. There's got to be something that we can work out.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

2.3s

You are. You are.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

16.4s

I'm staying here with my friends. Fine. Maybe your friends can pay your tuition. Because this morning I placed a stop payment on this semester's check. I'm sorry, son. Sometimes in life you have to realize a poor investment... and cut your losses.

National Lampoon's Van Wilder

Found 2224 results

"Depression: Is Prozac really the answer?" "Famine-- Crisis in Rwanda." "Tracking Tuition: Where does our money really go?" Each article well-written and researched by our own Gwen Pearson... and each article skipped over by the majority of the student body. I don't care. I won't pander to them.

Mail it in!

It does not look good. That's the end of the first half... and the Chickadees will need a miracle to come back and score.

Let's go kick some Matador tail-- How bad do you wanna be... a Delta? Would you walk on broken glass? Let the shards tear into your Achilles tendon... causing acute achondroplasia... which could lead to non-congenital dwarfism as you got older?

Dad, what are you doing here?

Is it true that this is your seventh year at Coolidge? Carry the two-- Yes, that's correct. So what's your boyfriend's name? Does he go to school here? - Does he appreciate you? - That's none of your business. You know what? You're right.

Excuse me. Where can I find Van Wilder? In the Guiness Book of World-fucking-Records, man... under "Raddest fucking dude alive"! Okay. Thanks. In any one of these three rooms, Gramps.

Ease up on the medical terms. Just keep it simple and terrifying. Gordon, there are very few things more terrifying than non-congenital dwarfism. Hey, Richard. Ready to study? Gwenny, I said 9:30. It's 9:20. I'm in the middle of an 80-year tradition here.

Come on. We got a ball game to win.

Who's my alabaster princess?

What is that intoxicating scent you're wearing, Doris? I have cats. Meow!

Oh, yeah. That's the shit. Guess what. I'm feeling a little cold sore coming on. Maybe we shouldn't do this for three to six weeks. Shut up, bitch, and give me some sugar.

You can either mail this in or drop it off. Go, baby, go!

I need more time. There's got to be something that we can work out.

You are. You are.

I'm staying here with my friends. Fine. Maybe your friends can pay your tuition. Because this morning I placed a stop payment on this semester's check. I'm sorry, son. Sometimes in life you have to realize a poor investment... and cut your losses.