Found 1429 results
38.6s
Pills! Pills! Bills! Pills! Bills! A sign of the times that rhymes Amanda Bynes drop that raggedy Andy circus circle jerkus... You guys are the improve guys, right? Yeah. That's cool. You're the guy with the terrible suggestions. Yeah, yeah. You're welcome, man. Yeah. Thanks, guys. Um, lady J is gonna be up next for you. Cynthia, that girl who died, she used to come here all the time, right? Mmm. This piece is called areolas. Did you know her? Yeah, she lived across the hall from me. Yeah? So why do you care so much?
22 Jump Street
41.8s
Because this is a college seminar, and that's how college seminars work. Professor gets into a lively conversation with the student. Friction creates fire, and that leads to lessons learned. Well, it's definitely harder to get drugs. I can personally tell you that. The average price of cocaine has dropped 70% in the last 30 years. Then your dealer's probably selling you some pretty stepped-on shit. (STUDENTS LAUGHING) Mr. mcquaid, college is a wonderful place. This is where you get to decide who you actually are, instead of the person that you're clearly pretending to be right now, which everyone sees through, by the way. You got to decide, do I just keep doing the same thing, or am I gonna choose a different path and question my convictions?
22 Jump Street
43.8s
Greedy man hands! ...a slam poem in her honor. Early stages, very early stages. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah. Wouldn't it be better just to, like, plan the stuff out ahead of time, and then not say it in front of people and embarrass yourself? That's a thing that people do. That's stand-up comedy. That's probably what you should do, because that stuff's funny. My brown nipple will produce white milk during lactation... What do you think of this? I actually think it's really powerful. That's cool that you said that, 'cause I actually thought it was really powerful, too, when the one girl was talking about her nips and shit. (APPLAUSE) Okay, does anybody have anything they want to share? Let's see what you got. Any more poets in the audience? I... I mean, do you really do poetry?
22 Jump Street
36.5s
He's Brad's brother. He follows him around everywhere, so I doubt we get Brad without Doug. That's not true. I have a serious girlfriend. I got a bad feeling about this guy, dude. Why? Why? I was talking to him for a second. He's got a big mouth, okay? I feel like he could fuck this whole thing up for us. See, you're fucking this up. You talk way too much. That guy is harmless, dude. Look at him, he's nice. ROOSTER: He looks like a 30-year-old eighth grader. ZOOK: He's gonna be fine. I'm just saying, the kid sucks. Okay, and Brad. Brad could be, like, our guy. He could, like, be a part of our thing. Our thing? Yeah. Shh. I'm trying to hear them be nice about me. This is fucking bullshit. Shit!
22 Jump Street