Well, you know, since I just returned from active duty in the Civil War that actually sounds very appealing. Oh, wait, I'm sorry. That was 150 years ago and I don't give a shit.
Ted
3.2s
You know what? I don't feel like talking to you about this.
Ted
1.7s
Say that one more time.
Ted
12.4s
NORAH: Thank you. Now, I'm going to give my chops a rest and bring a friend up to the stage. He's going to sing a song to a special lady in the audience who he loves very much. Please give a big hand to John Bennett.
Ted
1.4s
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Ted
5.4s
Hello, 911? I need the police right away. This guy took my teddy bear.
Ted
23.8s
Yeah, I'd rather just not talk about it. Do you want to go get a drink after this? I feel like I could use one after seeing a guy almost die. (CLEARS THROAT) No, I think I'd rather just have you take me home. One drink. Come on. No, not really feeling up to it. All right, I get it. And, you know, I don't blame you. I mean, when you think about it, it was actually really unfair of him to embarrass you like that.
Ted
2.2s
(PLASTER SMASHING) Oh, my God!
Ted
2.8s
Can you call him back? No, it's blocked.
Ted
1.4s
(WOMAN MOANING)
Ted
7.2s
Johnny, there you are. I had to get some air. That guy from your office is in there on the couch making outwith that Van Wilder-looking guy.
Ted
4s
Look, I'm sorry, I messed up... John, I need you out of the apartment tonight.
Ted
4.3s
Yeah! Thanks. We're going to take a short break, but we'll be back in a few.
Ted
1.8s
Happy playtime.
Ted
3.4s
You know, you guys seem pretty cool. You like to party?
Ted
1.3s
Lori!
Ted
13.7s
You know what? You're acting like a cock. You know that? What? I'm acting like a cock? Yes, you are. So shut your meat hole for a second and listen to me. Huh? Meat hole? What? That's not right, is it? No. "Pudding hole"? Is that what they say? No, it can't be that either.
