Found 245 results
1m25s
Samir and I are the best programmers they got. You haven't been showin' up, and you get to keep your job. Actually, I'm being promoted. - What? - I know, Michael. It's completely unfair. And I realised something today. It's not just about me and my dream of doing nothing. It's about all of us together. I don't know what happened to me at that hypnotherapist. Maybe it was just shock, and it's wearing off now... but when I saw that fat man keel over and die... Michael, we don't have a lot of time on this earth. We weren't meant to spend it this way. Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles... staring at computer screens all day... filling out useless forms... and listening to eight different bosses... drone on about mission statements. I told those fudgepackers I liked Michael Bolton's music. Ohh. That is not right, Michael. For five years now, you've worked your ass off... hoping for a promotion, profit sharing, or something. Five years... of your mid-twenties now gone. And you're gonna go in tomorrow... they're gonna throw you out on the street. You know why? So Bill Lumbergh's stock will go up a quarter of a point. Ugh. Michael, let's make that stock go down... and let's take enough money out of that place... so that we never have to sit in a cubicle ever again.
Office Space
1m7s
Oh, right, Lumbergh. Aah! Oh... God... Lumbergh! Peter, what is wrong with you? That was, like, two years ago. What? Did you know him? Yeah, I know him. I know him. He's my boss. He's my unholy, disgusting pig of a boss. Oh, he's not that disgusting. He represents all that is soulless and wrong... and you slept with him. Hey, that is none of your business, OK? I didn't ask you who you slept with before we were together. I don't care. I didn't think you slept with guys like Lumbergh! Listen to you. Who do you think you are? How dare you judge me? I mean, what are you? You think you're an angel? No, you're just this penny-stealing... wannabe criminal man. Yeah, well, that may be. But at least I never slept with Lumbergh. OK, that's... l'm done. I wanna get out of the car, OK? Stop. Call me when you grow up. Wait. That's probably never gonna happen. So don't call me, OK? Say hello to Lumbergh for me!
Office Space
45.3s
It's pretty brilliant. What it does is every time there's a bank transaction... where interest is computed... There are thousands a day... the computer ends up with these fractions of a cent... which it usually rounds off. What this does is it takes those little remainders... and puts it into an account. - This sounds familiar. - They did it in "Superman III." Right, uh... An underrated movie, actually. There were hackers that did it in the seventies as well. - So they check for this now. - No, here's the thing. Initech's so backed up with all the software we're updating... they'd never notice. You're right. Even if they wanted to, they couldn't check all that code. Thumbs up their asses. Thumbs up their asses. So, Michael, what's to stop you from doing this? It's not worth the risk. I got a good job.
Office Space
35.2s
Who's got my keys? I'm driving. Everything is gonna be OK. All right? OK? It's fun, and it's exciting. I gotta... I gotta go. All right? Joanna's coming over. Don't worry. You're worrying. All right? Monday morning, we're gonna check the account balance. Everything will be OK. Don't miss Tom's barbecue. I'll see you there. All right? Good night! Back up in your ass with the resurrection What were you guys celebrating last night? Oh, um... l'm not really at liberty to talk about it.
Office Space
45.9s
Hell, Lumbergh fucked her. Lumbergh fucked her. Lumbergh fucked her. That is great. I mean, she was seeing the "Oh" face for sure. Ohh, ohh, ohh. Ooh. If you could just move a little bit to the left. That's it. Great. Peter, what's happening? Um, could you give me those T.P.S. Reports ASAP, OK? Oh! - Joanna. - Yeah.
Office Space