Ted Joel McHale Clear all

Found 722 results

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2.5s
I'm not going to try to get you to take me back.

Ted

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1.7s
I don't know if I can drive!

Ted

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Hey.

Ted

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7.8s
Well, here I am. You mean, we get to be best friends for real? For real. Forever and ever?

Ted

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Wait a second.

Ted

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5.4s
These were John Lennon's glasses. They're worth, like, a million dollars. That's me and Tom Skerritt.

Ted

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2.2s
I know, sir, I'm sorry. It wasn't my fault.

Ted

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2s
All right, easy. Come on, Ted.

Ted

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1.3s
You asshole!

Ted

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1.3s
No.

Ted

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14.5s
You have to understand, I had no friends before he came along. He's the only reason I ever gained any fucking confidence. But you're no longer eight. You're 35 years old. And unless you're too blind to notice, he's not your only friend anymore. Can we talk about this another time, and just enjoy our anniversary dinner?

Ted

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3.7s
Sure. Great, we'll be right back. Come on, buddy.

Ted

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5.7s
That took guts. We need guts. I'm promoting you.

Ted

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1.2s
(AUDIENCE EXCLAIMS)

Ted

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Welcome back, Ted.

Ted

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2.2s
This is art. Get it?

Ted

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2.7s
Johnny. It's me.

Ted

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21.8s
Well, I am a former celebrity in a minimum wage job. This is how the cast of Diff'rent Strokes feels. All day, every day. Just awful. They must feel awful. The live ones must feel awful. Come on. It's not that bad, okay? I got a shitty job, and I assure you, lam quite content. Excuse me. I'm sorry to bother you but my son and I couldn't help but admire your teddy bear.

Ted