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6.3s

And I asked my dad if I could have a magical little teddy bear, too. And he said, "No."

Ted

25.5s

You promised me this was about work. Lori, why don't you like me? Ugh! I'm rich, I'm good-looking, my dad owns the company. I have a boyfriend. I have told you this. Yeah, the guy with the bear. But I'm talking about a mature relationship, Lori. If we were together, our babies would be spectacular. With my top-of-the-pyramid Caucasian genes and your splash of dark, beautiful, smoky...

Ted

2.4s

Is that a shit?

Ted

2.1s

Thank you for being so honest.

Ted

2.4s

Lori ever fart in front of you? Yeah.

Ted

12.9s

Octopussy. (GASPS) Baby! Gold star. And, by the way, my dancing was not that bad. It was pretty bad. I have cool moves. Yeah, so do people with Parkinson's. That's not how I remember it. Okay, how do you remember it?

Ted

1.8s

Savior of the universe!

Ted

6.4s

I love you, too. (LAUGHING) And you're nasty. Do you want to get nasty? You're a nasty girl.

Ted

2.1s

That's pretty much it.

Ted

1.2s

(SNARLS)

Ted

1.2s

(THUNDER CRASHING)

Ted

2.7s

(ALL CHEERING) (SQUAWKING)

Ted

1.2s

(DIALING)

Ted

3.4s

Look, I'm going to cut the shit, here. Please.

Ted

2.5s

Oh, Jesus. Yeah, she's pretty shook up.

Ted

10s

Teddy, come on, we're going to be late for dinner with your friends. Okay, be there in a second, baby. As you can see, my dance card is quite full. So, I'm going to have to decline. Can I just get a hug?

Ted

22.1s

You know, you guys, it's really not about that. I don't care about that. I mean, I'd love him if he was a janitor. I mean, he has a huge heart and we laugh a lot. It's just a bonus that he's the hottest guy in Boston. I don't know. I just wish he would get his life together. Our life. And he can't. And, I swear to God, it is because of that bear. You should give him an ultimatum. It's you or the bear.

Ted

1.2s

(GROANS)

Ted

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And I asked my dad if I could have a magical little teddy bear, too. And he said, "No."

Is that a shit?

Thank you for being so honest.

Lori ever fart in front of you? Yeah.

Octopussy. (GASPS) Baby! Gold star. And, by the way, my dancing was not that bad. It was pretty bad. I have cool moves. Yeah, so do people with Parkinson's. That's not how I remember it. Okay, how do you remember it?

Savior of the universe!

I love you, too. (LAUGHING) And you're nasty. Do you want to get nasty? You're a nasty girl.

That's pretty much it.

(SNARLS)

(THUNDER CRASHING)

(ALL CHEERING) (SQUAWKING)

(DIALING)

Look, I'm going to cut the shit, here. Please.

Oh, Jesus. Yeah, she's pretty shook up.

Teddy, come on, we're going to be late for dinner with your friends. Okay, be there in a second, baby. As you can see, my dance card is quite full. So, I'm going to have to decline. Can I just get a hug?

(GROANS)