Found 785 results

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2.3s
Jesus. Look at that black cock.

Ted 2

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2.2s
Yeah, sure, sounds great.

Ted 2

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1.5s
How far away does he live?

Ted 2

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1.4s
So what do you say to that?

Ted 2

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1.3s
(SIGHS)

Ted 2

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1.7s
He needs help.

Ted 2

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14.2s
You fucking believe that? No. This is insane. I mean, Tami's the woman I love. You know, I never would even have tried to adopt a dog if I had known it was gonna cause me this kind of shit storm. This whole thing is complete bullshit. I mean, if you ask me, we got to fight it.

Ted 2

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12.3s
Hi. You Okay? Yeah! I'm fine. You must be Ted. Yeah. Uh, I'm Ted, this is my buddy, John. Hi. Um, my uncle says that you guys are my first clients.

Ted 2

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16.5s
All right, I got Dred Scott v. Sandford, Plessy v. Ferguson and Brown v. the Board of Education. I got Kramer vs. Kramer, Alien vs. Predator, and Freddy vs. Jason. I got, uh, Ernest Goes to Camp, Ernest Goes to Jail and The Importance of Being Earnest, which was very disappointing.

Ted 2

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19.5s
Oh, my God, Teddy! (STUTTERS) What? What's wrong? Look at this. (SOBBING) "Dear Ted, "the state of Massachusetts regrets to inform you "that due to an oversight regarding your legal status "your marriage to Tami-Lynn McCafferty is unrecognized by the state "and, therefore, invalid and hereby annulled."

Ted 2

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8.6s
No, make sure you have all the updated information on our Comic Con placement. This has to be the biggest, most impressive rollout at the convention. Morning, Mr. Jessup.

Ted 2

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10s
Well, I guess it's all right. Those are the rejected sickle-cell samples. Ah, you hear that, Johnny? You're covered in rejected black-guy sperm. You look like a Kardashian. Fuck!

Ted 2

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5.5s
Uh, about a mile-and-a-half. Fuck, okay. Hey, it's okay. One foot in front of the other.

Ted 2

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4.7s
Hey, Johnny! You did it! Right here, buddy. Ew. I mean, awesome! (CHUCKLES)

Ted 2

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5.8s
No, not once, not ever. When I saw this, I threw up. Almost quit medicine.

Ted 2

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2.9s
Bottom line is, insemination is not possible.

Ted 2

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1.2s
Uh...

Ted 2

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12.7s
(SOBS) I don't understand, okay? None of this makes any sense. It's okay. It's okay, honey. Come on, let's just go. No, what does this mean, Teddy? Does it mean we can't have a baby? I don't know. But it's gonna be okay. Everything's gonna be okay. It really isn't.

Ted 2