OFFICER: Stand down! Hold your fire! Wade, what did you do? Colossus, no! You were right, Wade. You are not X-Men material. No shit, Shiny Gandhi! What was your first clue? The hollow point through that fuckhead's face? That kid was abused! You can always tell! COLOSSUS: We have rules! You are not judge, jury or executioner! Fuck your rules! I fight for what's right! And sometimes you gotta fight dirty! You let me down for the last time, Wade.
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[SHOUTING CONTINUES] [GRUNTS] Hey, baby!
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[GASPS]
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[GRUNTS]
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[IN ENGLISH] I don't speak Cantonese, Mister... Well, I'm not even gonna attempt that. But I did take 8th grade Spanish, so... [SPEAKING SPANISH] Which literally translates to... I don't bargain, pumpkin fucker. [CELL PHONE CLATTERS]
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[WOMAN SCREAMING]
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[WINDING MUSIC BOX]
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DEADPOOL: To understand why I took a cat-nap on 1,200 gallons of high-test fuel... I need to take you back to the dewy slopes of six weeks ago. I'd gone international, taking out mass murderers, gangsters, unspeakable monsters. People nobody would touch. Except me. I'm gonna touch them all over. [CELL PHONE RINGING]
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Oh. Oh, this isn't Gilbert's. I am so sorry. I thought this was an anal-bleaching party. [GUNS FIRING] [GRUNTING]
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I'm sorry, what? You heard me. Trust me, that's a terrible idea. I'm really not ready. You are ready. I'm not. Be at the X-Jet in five. I can do thirty. Now. I can do now. Final offer. REPORTER: Irene Merryweather, WHIT News. Live here at a breaking news situation at the Essex House for Mutant Rehabilitation. A mutant boy is appearing to have some sort of an incident... with police here behind me. RUSSELL: Get away from me! There are two police vehicles that are overturned. There are open fires. Fuck off! Stay back! REPORTER: A scene of absolute chaos here. OFFICER: Calm down. RUSSELL: I'll burn you! You stay back!