Okay, hold on. Hold on. There's nothing funny about that. I lived with my mother before I made it. Just me and her. I'm that kid whose father went out for a pack of cigarettes, and he never came back. Aww. I know what that's like, Murray. I've been the man of the house for as long as I can remember. I take good care of my mother. All that sacrifice, she must love you very much. She does. She always tells me to smile and put on a happy face. She says I was put here to spread joy and laughter. Aww.
Joker
11.6s
Happy, what was that? Are you okay? Mom, what? That noise! Did you hear that noise? I'm watching an old war movie! Turn it down! Um...
Joker
1.2s
Here.
Joker
1.5s
Are we clear?
Joker
1m16s
♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Wiggle your ears ♪ ♪ Wiggle your ears ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Wiggle your ears ♪ ♪ Wiggle your ears ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ And you really want to show it ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Wiggle your ears ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Stomp your feet ♪ ♪ Stomp your feet ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Stomp your feet ♪ ♪ Stomp your feet ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ And you really want to show it ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Stomp your feet ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Shout "hurray" ♪ ♪ Shout "hurray" ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ Shout "hurray" ♪ ♪ Shout "hurray" ♪ ♪ If you're happy and you know it ♪ ♪ And you really want to... ♪ Hoyt, please, I love this job. Arthur, I need to know why you brought a gun into a kids' hospital. It's a prop. It's part of my act now. That's bullshit. Bullshit. What kind of clown carries a fucking gun? Besides, Randall told me you tried to buy a .38 off him last week. Randall told you that? You're a fuck-up, Arthur, and a liar. You're fired!
Joker
43.2s
- Oh, hey. - Hey. Were you following me today? Yeah. I thought that was you. I was hoping you'd come in and rob the place. I have a gun. I could come by tomorrow. You're so funny, Arthur. Yeah. You know, I do stand-up comedy. You should maybe come see a show sometime. I could do that. Yeah? Yeah. You'll let me know when? Yeah.
Joker
16.2s
It's something I'll address once I have tenure, but for now... She says, "Excuse me, Professor Lewis, I think I might be in danger of failing your 'Intro to Western Civ, ' and I just want you to know I'm willing to do anything to pass." And I said, "Anything?" And she said...
Joker
7.7s
It's Monday and Wednesday, three to five. She says, "Excuse me, Professor Lewis." I can't use my real last name at this college 'cause they don't hire Jews.
Joker
7.7s
I know. I know. Why is she a senior in the intro? I didn't buy it either. So, she comes to me during my office hours.
Joker
4s
...and my wife is a senior in my "Intro To Western Civ."
Joker
4.5s
So, I'll tell you how I operate. I'm a professor at a prestigious New England university...