Found 222 results
28.7s
Excuse me, everyone. Sorry to interrupt. I just thought you all should know this. Chuck Sherman is a liar. I never had sex with him. He's never had sex with anyone. I know this because he told me. Once he tried to screw a grapefruit, but that's all. Oh. He also told me that when he gets nervous, he sometimes wets his pants. Thank you for your time.
American Pie
48.9s
I don't think he's comin' back. # Close my eyes at night # - # Close my eyes # - # Wonderin' where would I be without you in my life # - # Oh # - # Everything I did was just a bore # - # Just a bore # - # Everywhere I went seems I been there before # # But you brighten up for me all of my days # - # With a love so sweet # - # In so many ways # # I just wanna stop # - # And thank you, baby # - # I just wanna stop # - # And thank you, baby # - # Thank you, baby # # How sweet it is to be loved by you ## Yeah, Oz! You fuckin' rule! - Fuckin' rule! - Yeah!
American Pie
21.9s
27.8s
Stifler's mom got it in the divorce. That reminds me of this one time... Hey, can I ask you a question? How come you don't have any stories? I've got lots of them, and you don't have any. Oh, I've got stories. Believe me. They're just, uh... They're just a little more risque than tales of band camp. Are they gross or something? Like guy stuff? Tell me! Okay. You want a story? Here's a story. Stifler finds this beer...
American Pie
31.6s
Excuse me. Uh, that's Paul Finch, right? - Yeah. - Well, you've seen him in the locker room, right? - Uh, yeah. - So, my friends, they want to know. Is it true? You know, that he's... equipped. I have no idea. Finch showers with his bathing suit on. I mean, uh... As a matter of fact, it is true. The guy's huge! - Does he have a date for the prom yet? - No, definitely not. All right. Thanks.
American Pie
1m29s
Hey, what are you doin' here? Just enjoying my first exhilarating lacrosse experience. - You kicked butt. - Oh, thanks. - Um, Chris... - Oh, you can call me Oz, if you want. - Do I have to? - You can call me Ostreicher. - What's your middle name? - Nah, forget it. - Come on. I won't tell anyone. - Well, neither will I. Okay. Um. So, I had this thought and... It may seem like it's way out of left field. I don't know if you can, but since I'm not going with anybody, I thought that maybe... Those guys sucked ass! Choir chick, what the hell are you doing here? Well, uh, I was asking Chris to prom. So, do you want to go? Oh, yeah! That would be great. Well, just don't expect Oz to pay for the limo! Stifler, fuck! I mean... Why do you got to be so insensitive all the time? What? Whatever. Look, uh, don't forget. My cottage after prom. On Lake Michigan. Hey, wait up, you pussies. Where you goin'? Ah, well, I gotta... I gotta hit the showers now, but I think this is gonna be really, really good. - Yeah. Me too. - All right. - Bye. - Bye. Bye.
American Pie