It was a time before cell phones and steroids. And for Ron and his now-wife Veronica, life was good. The Tooth Fairy's exposed breast made the child uncomfortable. The Bishop wore buttless chaps to the bat mitzvah. Bat mitzvah. The garden gnome had a normal-size penis. The garden gnome had a normal-size penis.
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Come back!
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Sorry.
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You know what? What?
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Oh, wow, he was having some fun.
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It's sexual and yet frightening. It's an odd mixture.
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Oh, no! Grab the children! Save the children! Five, four... Have a great broadcast. You, too, darling.
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Corningstone. Corningstone.
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Good evening. This is the weekend edition of WBC News at 6:30. I'm Ron Burgundy. And I'm Veronica Corningstone. Our top story tonight. The U.N. today announced sanctions against... When the broadcast is over, send these two up to my office.
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Whammy! Whammy! Whammy! Whammy! Whammy! Whammy!
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Would it be wrong to say you smell terrific? Ron, please! Okay. What are you?
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And after I received my Masters in Journalism from Columbia, I got a job with the London bureau for ABC News. Wow, London. You're so impressive, and I've... I've only been out of the United States twice. A handful of times in Mexico, and then the second time I left the country, we went to Salem, Oregon. Mr. Burgundy, are you nervous? God, yes. Did I scare you by coming on so strong?
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Oh, my God.
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Ron! No!
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However, we won't begin our tale here. No, our story begins in a place all newsmen dream of. In New York City.