Found 245 results
23.1s
So, from now on, only use the new time sheets... if you've worked on two or more job codes in one day... and you need the extra columns to fit it all in. Otherwise, use the old time sheets... Where's Peter? I heard he didn't show up this weekend. Uh, I don't know. ...really, really help us out. Who's that guy? So, uh... any questions?
Office Space
54.2s
- I have a question. - Yes? In this conjugal visits, you can have sex with women? Yep, you sure can. OK, I'll do it. That's what I'm talkin' about when I talk about America! Can we discuss the plan? OK, yeah, good, right. It works like a computer virus. All we do is load it into the credit union's mainframe. It'll do the rest. Get me that disk, and I'll take it from there. Before we go any further, all right? We have to swear to God, Allah... that nobody knows about this but us, all right? No family members, no girlfriends. Nobody. - Of course. - Agreed. Don't worry, man! I won't tell anyone, either. - What the fuck is that? - Don't worry. He's cool. All right. Here's how I see it all going down. Peter, congratulations. This is one heck of a promotion. Thank you, Bob. We'll get some people under you right away.
Office Space
35.7s
But as soon as he backs out of his driveway... Bam! He gets slammed big-time by a drunk driver. - Is he OK? - Sort of. Broke both his wrists, legs, a couple of ribs, his back... but he's getting a huge settlement out of this. Like seven figures. He's getting out of the hospital tomorrow. He's throwing a big party this weekend to celebrate. We're all invited. I'm thinking I might take that new chick from logistics. Things go well, I might be showing her my "Oh" face. Oh, oh, oh... You know what I'm talking about. Oh. Yeah. Right. See you guys there.
Office Space
26.6s
Come on. This isn't Riyadh. They're not going to saw your hands off here. The worst they'd do is put you for a couple of months... into a white-collar, minimum-security resort. Shit, we should be so lucky. They have conjugal visits there. - Really? - Yes. Shit! I'm a free man. I haven't had a conjugal visit in six months. So what do you think? This thing is actually pretty fail-safe, Samir. Samir?
Office Space
36.6s
Uh, listen, I heard about your... your settlement. Congratulations. Well, thanks, Peter. You know, I'm glad you're here, because I wanted to talk to you. I know how you get depressed about your job and all, and... I just wanted you to know that I know how you feel. I used to be the same way. - Really? - Sure. Maybe I didn't whine as much. But I bet I hated my job even more than you... and I'd been doing it for over thirty years. Wow. Just remember, if you hang in there long enough... good things can happen in this world. I mean, look at me.
Office Space
1m18s
Uh, no. No, you don't understand. It's, uh, very complicated. It's, uh... It's aggregate, so I'm talking about fractions of a penny... and, uh, over time, they add up to a lot. Oh, OK. So you're gonna make a lot of money, right? - Yeah. - Right. It's not yours? Uh... well, it becomes ours. How is that not stealing? I don't think I'm explaining this very well. Um, the 7-Eleven, right? You'd take a penny from the tray. From the crippled children? No, that's the jar. I'm talking about the tray... The pennies for everybody. Oh, for everybody. OK. Yeah. Well, those are whole pennies. I'm just talking about fractions of a penny, OK? But we do it from a much bigger tray... and we do it a couple of million times. So what's wrong with that? I don't know. It just seems wrong. It's not wrong. Initech is wrong. Initech is an evil corporation, all right? Chotchkie's is wrong. Doesn't it bother you that you have to get up in the morning... and you have to put on a bunch of pieces of flair? Yeah, but I'm not about to go in and start... taking money from the register. Well, maybe you should. The Nazis had pieces of flair that they made the Jews wear. What?
Office Space
21.5s