Drop the mic, baby! Drop the mic, baby! - That's what I'm talking about! - Peace out, niggas! I see you, boy. Nasty!
Dirty Grandpa
12.5s
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Go! Go! Chug!
Dirty Grandpa
1m18s
Hey. ♪ For all those times you stood by me ♪ For all the truth that you made me see ♪ For all the joy you brought to my life ♪ For all the wrong that you made right ♪ For every dream you made come true ♪ For all the love I found in you ♪ I'll be forever thankful, baby ♪ You're the one who held me up ♪ And never let me fall Yeah, yeah ♪ You're the one who saw me through ♪ Through it all ♪ You were my strength when I was weak ♪ You were my voice when I couldn't speak ♪ You were my eyes when I couldn't see ♪ You saw the best there was in me ♪ Lifted me up when I couldn't reach ♪ You gave me faith 'cause you believed ♪ I'm everything I am - Damn! - ♪ Because you loved me?
Dirty Grandpa
2.9s
Sting? You're stung!
Dirty Grandpa
7.5s
You can't get into it anyway because you don't know my code. Looks like your grandpa remembered your birthday! - What? Give me that! - We're going to fucking Daytona.
Dirty Grandpa
13.7s
He says he's very sorry, but he can't marry you. Uncle Ruben, can you turn that thing up a little? It doesn't get any louder. Where'd you get that thing, SkyMall?
Dirty Grandpa
2.1s
I just smoked crack!
Dirty Grandpa
2.3s
- Blood. - Semen it is.
Dirty Grandpa
2.2s
And you're my uncle.
Dirty Grandpa
1m20s
All right, our team won! Let's celebrate by buying local drugs from a reputable, local drug dealer. Hey, what are you doing here? I'm selling drugs, man. I'm trying to put my kid through preschool. How honest is that! Touching my face a lot, bro. Touching my face a whole lot, man. Why don't you take some of this. This'Il mellow you out. - What is it? - E-cig, bro. "E" is for "Weed"! Sure, why not? Yeah, ooh, that's a big... That's a big one. Oh! Whoo! Just be glad you didn't smoke this, man. This is crack! - What? - Oh, yeah! This one... Oh, wait a minute... Maybe that one's crack and this one's weed. Hang on. What'd you do now, Pam? Fuck. Hold on. Which one's crack? Okay. I got this. Don't freak out. Sorry to worry you, man. You're not gonna believe this. - They're both crack. - What? And you have taken an amount that will probably kill you in about 30 minutes. - I just smoked crack? - Yeah. But just, like, a lot. I just smoked crack.
Dirty Grandpa
2.7s
Bingo!
Dirty Grandpa
7.5s
You know, Stinky had more confirmed kills than anyone in our platoon back in 'Nam? 118. Shut the fuck up.
Dirty Grandpa
22.2s
Hey, hey! Come on! What the hell! Hey, guy, unless you want a Chipwich or some heroin, get off my ice cream truck! Who the fuck is this slob? Slob? I am a small business owner! I am the backbone of this country! I am holding a Taser! - Whoa! Shit! - Dude, should I stop? - What are you... - I'm kind of in the middle of it right here. Shit! All right.
Dirty Grandpa
19.5s
I kind of feel like we're just getting in your way. - Yeah? - I'm sure there's something... What the fuck? Did you just get naked? - It's the best way to sleep. - Oh, my God! I picked it up in Uganda from the Umbatdo. Umbat-don't let your junk touch my leg again or you're sleeping on the floor.
Dirty Grandpa
14.9s
Hey, hon, the people at the venue said they don't have enough mint napkins, so which one do you like better? The seafoam or the pistachio? I'll get it.
Dirty Grandpa
8.4s
- The mic's off. - Jason, your mic cut out. What? Your mic cut out at the most inopportune time, so we can't hear why you want to leave those images up.