- No, I didn't. - Let me show you. - Beautiful. - Everybody take five. I'll be right back. Were you all not there last year for our sexual-harassment meeting? - Were you not there, Larry? - He needs to go. He wasn't sexually harassing me.
The Ugly Truth
7s
- Our table's waiting. Shall we? - Come this way. - Mike, you're doing a hell of a job. - Yeah, I couldn't agree more.
The Ugly Truth
6.2s
- Where's Rick? - I sent him home. I thought you and I could celebrate on our own. Give me some of that.
The Ugly Truth
4.1s
Men like watching penis-shaped food go into a girl's mouth.
The Ugly Truth
5s
- I had a really good time tonight. - Me too. Yeah.
The Ugly Truth
1.3s
He delivers it.
The Ugly Truth
9.2s
Of all the primates, bonobo monkeys... ...are the closest relatives to human beings... ...both genetically and socially. Especially when it comes to sex.
The Ugly Truth
8.2s
- Hey, how convenient. - No, I... I thought it was you at the door. Well, I guess we're all interchangeable.
The Ugly Truth
8.4s
I'm sorry you didn't get to spend time with little Colin this weekend. And by "little," I don't mean undersized... ...although I highly suspect that's the case.
The Ugly Truth
8.7s
Saw me what? What, you saw me introduce them to some network executives? They wanna be actresses, baby. I mean, who am I to kill their dream?
The Ugly Truth
1.7s
Yes!
The Ugly Truth
6.1s
Mike. Hi, it's Lauren. I'm having a party on Saturday... ... and you know what happens when I drink tequila.
The Ugly Truth
20.4s
Dorky? Hell, no. Are you kidding? You're ahead of the game. Women are coming to you. You know how cool that is? Relish this moment, okay? Now get the hell out of here. I'll see you at 5. - Okay. - We'll celebrate. - Don't forget the pizza, King Kong. - Hey, have I ever?
The Ugly Truth
16.6s
More on this when we come back. We'll hear from a zoo official forced to take... And we're back with The Ugly Truth, where we're gonna be talking about... ... what it is men and women really want in relationships. I've been looking through some books. Smart Women, Foolish Choices.
The Ugly Truth
7.6s
KS XP retained the copyright to your old segment title... ...so we retitled you: Morning Madness With Mike.
The Ugly Truth
1.5s
Just do it.
The Ugly Truth
13.6s
Oh, my God. You're Mike Chadway. I love you. - Hey, buddy, what the hell? - Dude, what the fuck? - Dude, what the fuck? - What? No, no, no. I'm not talking to you. - I'm not talking to you. - Okay, did I do something wrong?
The Ugly Truth
43.1s
- Oh, God. - Camera 1, ready for a three-shot. - I'm not frowny. - Yes, you are. Move in here and give this beautiful woman a kiss. - God. This is ridiculous. - McFlaccid? - That mean what I think it means? - Yes. Kiss her. - No. They're not gonna... - Give it to her, right in front of me. - And in front of them. - Let me... Goddamn it, Georgia, let me be a man. - No! - Zoom in on that, 2. Zoom in. America doesn't want to see this. And that, my friends, is the ugly truth. Get ready to roll to break. Ready to roll... Oh, you are a man. He is a man. Break. Cut to commercial! - Cut to commercial! - That was great! Wasn't that great? I told you that guy was great. Good job, everybody.
