This is the American fantasy, right here. A professional NFL player is called upon to save the world. Tom Brady could do that. Tom Brady could do that!
Ted
7.4s
Look, all I'm saying is that Boston women are, on the whole, a paler, uglier sort than women from the elsewheres of life.
Ted
4.7s
Hug me. (SCREAMS) You're my best friend, John.
Ted
1.2s
(HONKING)
Ted
8.5s
Mom, Dad, guess what? My teddy bear's alive! (CHUCKLES) Really? Well, isn't that exciting. No, Mom, he's really alive. Look.
Ted
2.9s
Listen, John and I may have our problems, but at least he tried.
Ted
1.2s
Ah!
Ted
16.2s
A-E-I-O-U See? There, proof. Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits. You were right. If you can punch through this wall, you really are Flash Gordon. Are you going to do it? I'm going to punch through it. Come on, Sam, do it! Do it!
Ted
7.8s
Well, here I am. You mean, we get to be best friends for real? For real. Forever and ever?
