(SINGING) Oh, my little sixpence My pretty little sixpence Stop it. Knock it off. I love my sixpence Better than my life Stop it! Fuck! Why you got to take it to that place? You took it to a very... Now it's real. Now it's a real thing. Come on. Take it easy. All right, look, let's just find a better place to get stoned.
Ted
9.7s
Wait, was it any one of those names with a "Lynn" after it? Yes. I got you, motherfucker. I got you. Okay. Brandi-Lynn, Heather-Lynn, Channing... Tami-Lynn. Fuck!
Ted
1.4s
Back off, Susan Boyle!
Ted
1.7s
(THUNDER CRASHING) (SCREAMS)
Ted
1.8s
I got to go.
Ted
8.5s
That's the new checkout girl. Don't know her name. Seems cute. Yeah, very cute. Do you know what I'd like to do to her? Something I call a Dirty Fozzie.
Ted
5.9s
What I meant to say was Ted's very handsome so I'm always interested in meeting the lady that can snatch him up.
Ted
2.7s
Isn't love enough? I submit that love is enough.
Ted
1.4s
(SINGING)
Ted
7.2s
You know, you had no business being out on that dance floor, but I'm really happy that you were. (HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING)
Ted
6.8s
Check this out. That's me on the high school diving team. We dove the shit out of that pool that year.
Ted
6.2s
Dude, one man to another. I got you on this. Thank you. I'll be back.
Ted
3.2s
You know, Lori, someday, there's going to be a ring in there.
Ted
2.3s
I'll help you get on your feet out there, I promise.
Ted
2.9s
Wow. Goddamn right, "Wow."
Ted
3.2s
(SIGHS) It doesn't feel like four years, does it?
Ted
2.3s
Lori and I may just need a little space right now.