John Leguizamo Comedy Clear all

Found 680 results

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8s
You said it would fucking be here! I'm telling you, my intel was rock solid. I had guys on the inside.

Violent Night

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5.2s
Honey, what's wrong? Daddy never took me to see Santa at the mall this year.

Violent Night

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Yes! Okay...

Violent Night

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1.9s
- Merry Christmas, Mommy. - Merry Christmas.

Violent Night

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Son of a bitch.

Violent Night

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1.9s
Just wake up.

Violent Night

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Yes.

Violent Night

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9.4s
Santa, please don't die. Wake up. Wake up. We need to get him close to the fire. Jason.

Violent Night

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I believe in him, too.

Violent Night

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I need a drink. ♪ Two turtledoves ♪ ♪ And a partridge in a pear tree... ♪ Hey, look at that.

Violent Night

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Move, move.

Violent Night

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Ho-Ho-Holy shit. ♪ Christmas will never go away. ♪ Gertrude would never trust anybody who wasn't blood with this kind of info. So... the in-laws wouldn't know shit, which means that I can shoot her... unless you tell me where the fucking money is. Please don't, okay? It's Christmas. Shut up!

Violent Night

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4.3s
Santa gets a candy cane, too? Yeah. Mm, okay.

Violent Night

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I made these all by myself. - No way. - Mm-hmm. I even made one that looks exactly like Santa. - Exactly. - Yeah.

Violent Night

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21.6s
This year has been weird. I never got to tell Santa what I wanted for Christmas. Oh, honey. Come here. You know what? You go put your pj's on, and I will be two minutes.

Violent Night

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It's perfect. No peeking. This house has so many chimneys.

Violent Night

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Merry Christmas to you, too, Senator.

Violent Night

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1m22s
-Well, that makes her sound like a whore. -Okay. Oh, she doesn't even know the meaning of the word. I'm starving. Let's eat. Great. And, Mom, I think Gertrude is a beautiful name. Mm-hmm. I only call her Gertrude. - Merry Christmas, Gertrude. - Come on, Bertrude. ♪ When the kids are fast asleep ♪ ♪ Gently down the stairs we'll creep ♪ ♪ Then we'll lock and bolt all the doors ♪ ♪ Just you and me and Santa Claus ♪ ♪ We'll be as quiet as quiet can be ♪ ♪ Planting toys under the tree ♪ ♪ We'll be crawling around on all fours ♪ ♪ Just you and me ♪ ♪ And Santa Claus ♪ ♪ For soon will be ♪ ♪ That magic time ♪ ♪ When we hear that midnight chime ♪ ♪ When that flying sleigh ♪ ♪ Finally flies away ♪ ♪ We'll have a very merry Christmas Day ♪ ♪ We'll raise a toast to the team with the most ♪ ♪ The best there ever was ♪ ♪ You and me and Santa Claus... ♪ Another fucking Christmas.

Violent Night