This week has been a scheduling nightmare! My iCal crashed, and now all my appointments are set in 201 9. And in Hebrew. lt's a flawed program. l've been saying this for years. -Shut up. -Shit.
Office Christmas Party
24.9s
Hey! What the hell? l hired you to pretend to be my girlfriend, then you go and give all my co-workers hand jobs? You hired me to impress your co-workers, and he was pretty impressed. -Listen, l want my money back. -Well... l'm sorry, what was that? l couldn't hear you over my gun. l... l want my money back. l'm sorry. Customer services are not available right now, but perhaps l can address your grievance.
Office Christmas Party
6.4s
Carol! Listen. Clay has gone to get wasted with a psychopath, and he's got $300,000 strapped to his chest.
Office Christmas Party
10.2s
This is so funny. Do that thing where you pull his asshole through his face. Don't please. Shit! Santa's gonna get fucked up tonight! Who wants to party with Santa?
Office Christmas Party
11.6s
-No, l commissioned it. -That's more expensive. Yeah, but worth it. l think it's a great new addition. l'd love to talk about Data City, the pitch this afternoon... l think it's super important. lt is really important, but we've got kind of a crisis.
Office Christmas Party
1.7s
Josh, it's happening.
Office Christmas Party
1.2s
Hello?
Office Christmas Party
5.7s
That's not me. This is the machine. The machine's... The machine's broken. lt must've run out of ink. Or...
Office Christmas Party
3.4s
Okay, Becca's real. And we're not gonna mix business with pleasure.
Office Christmas Party
24s
Okay, l'm gonna suck my dick. She's gonna suck it on this one, guys. Guys, can we go back to one for sucking my dick? l like it 'cause it looks like he's trying just a little too hard. The artist? l hadn't thought about the artist. Was this not where you had the key to the city of Margaritaville? Yeah, l did. l got rid of it.
Office Christmas Party
1.2s
Pardon me.
Office Christmas Party
9.8s
Andrew from the copy room told me that he had mono. And l said that l wanted to get mono because l wanted to take a month off from work. And l kissed him deeply.
Office Christmas Party
1.9s
Tracey, are you in here?
Office Christmas Party
1.3s
Tracey?
Office Christmas Party
11.6s
"Hi, l'm Carol. l have the shingles again." "l'm Carol. Has anyone seen my TV Guide?" "l'm Carol. Change frightens me." "We have to put Carol down. She's old."
Office Christmas Party
7.3s
-What? She offered you a job? -Yeah. Triple the salary. An apartment overlooking Central Park. l got double and moving costs.
