Length is very important. We need short enough to see some thigh, but not so short to see vag. - Vag says you're trying too hard. - You think? Jeans are all about the curvature of the ass. You've... Well, you've got the raw materials. Now all you need is the proper presentation. - Did you just tell me I have a nice ass? - Do you have to be so crass? Jesus. Rule number four: never talk about your problems... ...because men don't really listen or care. - Some men care. - No, some men pretend to care. When we ask you how you're doing, it's guy code for: "Let me stick my dick in your ass." Oh, I know you think Colin is above it all, but trust me, he's a guy. If he's even remotely into you... ...he's probably thought about your orifices at least 10 times. I love how you assume all men are as perverse as you are. Oh, I don't assume. I know.
The Ugly Truth
4s
All right, deal. Now what? Always make an impression.
The Ugly Truth
9.2s
Of all the primates, bonobo monkeys... ...are the closest relatives to human beings... ...both genetically and socially. Especially when it comes to sex.
The Ugly Truth
8.5s
- Even if it's constructive? - Never. Men are incapable of growth, change or progress. For men, self-improvement ends at toilet training.
The Ugly Truth
4.1s
Men like watching penis-shaped food go into a girl's mouth.
The Ugly Truth
18.3s
- I know. - No, actually, it's a good thing. I'm used to women I can figure out in five seconds. But I can't do that with you. He's an idiot. I figured you out in two. Now, tell him good night and stick your tits out. - We're gonna give this one last shot. - Well, good night then.
The Ugly Truth
6.1s
- Well, that went well, I think. - Sure did. - Yeah. - Let's get a drink. Bob and Harold...
The Ugly Truth
3.3s
Am I really that good? Or are you...?
The Ugly Truth
3.7s
Chemistry. I smell threesome.
The Ugly Truth
2.2s
No, you hate yourself for being so shallow.
The Ugly Truth
2.3s
He said he was running late.
The Ugly Truth
9.5s
Friday... - Would Saturday be better? - Actually... ...Abby, the thing is, I haven't really settled in yet.
The Ugly Truth
1.2s
Why?
The Ugly Truth
11.4s
...I had a sales job... ...where I was driving around a lot, listening to talk radio. I started calling in, and then I realized I'm smarter than everybody else. Just ask my producer, Abby.
The Ugly Truth
4.6s
We have an early flight tomorrow. We should go.
The Ugly Truth
2.7s
What is he doing here already?
The Ugly Truth
11.4s
Okay. Keep the conversation under a minute. Now go. - Under a minute? Under a minute. - Yes. No, wait, wait, wait. Come here, come here. You're such an asshole.
